Pwny Boi

I can't really believe it but it seems to be the case that the Times has not covered a credible accusation of rape against the President of the United States, but has two solid stories on Obama's cheesecake factory quip.

Mariana Trench Once Again Named Worst Place To Raise Child https://theonion.com/mariana-trench-once-again-named-worst-place-to-raise-ch-1819575833/

there are people serving life sentences right now on thinner evidence than we have for "donald trump was jeffrey epstein's partner in serial rape" democrats-judiciary.house.gov/media-center...

NEW: The DOGE operative who gutted USAID -- firing thousands of employees and canceling lifesaving programs -- never actually signed the paperwork that's legally required for him to be employed by the agency.

1. Not sure when a new, on-the-record rape allegation against a sitting president isn’t considered news — especially considering Trump was found liable by a jury in a similar case — but it was ignored by most mainstream media outlets

A serial rapist was elected twice as President, a fact we don't reckon with nearly enough. Now one of two major political parties has been molded in his image, run for and by violent sexual abusers who hate women.

i am inviting anyone from a legacy media organization to explain to me why the house judiciary dems report on trump’s epstein’s ties and multiple allegations of rape isn’t worthy of extensively reporting on. i’m serious. i want to understand.

Per a new report from House Democrats, Trump's DOJ is withholding evidence of his ties to Epstein and slow-walking the complete release of the Epstein files. It's time to end the cover-up and expose the truth. Remember this when you cast your ballot. www.ms.now/news/house-j...

it feels truly insane that it’s not

That it'll fail because they lack sufficient consolidation and centralized control does not make it trivial that the president of the United States is trying to steal elections and produce an illegitimate sham Congress. It is open rebellion against the Constitution and morally tantamount to treason.

I'm reading john randolph tucker's speech defending slavery and secession and the part where he compares Lincoln to the biblical Rameses saying "Pharoah was resolved not to let the people go" is an incredible bit for a literal slaver

The racism that Abdul El-Sayed is facing from Republicans, the press, and even some Democrats is so disgusting.

I want to hear less about the polls and more about the consequences. The media should be focused on what the next 2 years will look like if Trump continues to be unchecked by Congress.

actually,

In the bedrock of my soul I know he started out thinking the press pool was a literal pool and has been seething with disappointment since he discovered the mistake

saw someone compare mamdani to goku and el-sayed to vegeta and that seems right to me

“The internet is a store but it used to be a library” hits me like a slug to the chest

Now is the time to care about everyone, not “once we win” The time to care about everyone is always always always now

Octopus is the easiest thing to cut out of your diet on moral grounds because it’s basically never around, probably has dreams and emotions and tastes like a tire.

[Two Opticians getting married] Priest: For better or worse? Better or worse? Better or worse?

Palestinian skateboarder in Gaza doing a kickflip over an unexploded US-made (in Garland, Texas) Mk. 84 2000lb aerial bomb, provided to Israel as one of many tens of thousands of aerial bombs in the 1,000 and 2,000lb class included in US military assistance.

Natalie Harp Raids Trump’s Underwear Drawer theonion.com/natalie-harp...

It cannot be stressed enough, in part because our political press seems to just brush this off, but Donald Trump loves state-sanctioned violence. When he says this, he absolutely means it. Remember, when the J6ers were going to hang Mike Pence on the Capitol lawn, Trump was perfectly fine with it.

lmao

cloud’s identity crisis 🐥 #ff7rebirth

oh no was it stealing things you were saying and doing to use for its own purposes

Ukrainian presidential advisor Serhiy Beskrestnov confirms Elon Musk's Space X crippled Ukrainian capabilities last night. In other words, the US deliberately sabotaged European defence operations mid-mission. Every country in the world should move away from buying American hardware ASAP.

since we’re doing this discourse again here’s why im no longer on twitter

that’s right

Our internet, how we get all of our information, now has banned using the word "sex" without writing it like "s*x" but our kids are being inundated with people falling off rollercoasters, being mauled by Tigers, and jumping off buildings. It creates a culture afraid of people but in love with death.

This is the funniest thing I've seen in a week.

I’m ok. Make no mistake: this is an attempt to target political enemies and weaponize federal law enforcement. For ten years, Trump has targeted me with baseless lies and smear campaigns. This is just the latest escalation in his campaign of political intimidation. I will not be silenced.

I keep reading that there have been no public executions in the United States for decades. Not true.

I prefer BlueSky to anything Zuckerbased. NEW COMIC: "True Story"

Okay so we have a number now: the Onion is officially 6 months ahead of reality.

I am angry tonight. Because tonight ICE shot a New Yorker. They shot a New Yorker while his five year old child was in the car. ICE makes this city less safe. We want them out. Now.

"YOU’RE LISTENING TO SISYPHUS FM, THE HOME OF NON-STOP ROCK"

Man who won’t give his employees piss breaks claims many piss breaks on the horizon

Damn