Jennifer C. 🌻

i worry that men think being A Good Guy is dramatically and heroically intervening on behalf of an endangered woman and then being publicly rewarded on a grand scale when actually being A Good Guy is just usually saying, “hey man that’s not funny” or “wow that’s fucked up” and there is no reward

Donald Trump: Dolly Parton went on the stage with that loser Hanoi Jane and stood there while she bad mouthed me. Then she turned down the medal of honor... Natalie are you posting this on Truth Social? Natalie Harp:

one thing i’ve been keeping to myself is that when people talk about automating their workflow i don’t know what that means

Must be great to work on an aircraft carrier right now. You get to hang out next to Iran without fresh food for months on end and meanwhile they're going to have to gut the whole ship to make the launch catapults work on steam like in the olden days because the president is scared of magnets

Private equity is price gouging firefighters now. Yes, you read that right. Firefighters. Is this the most evil thing they've done yet?

that is in fact literally in the bible. it's Matthew 6:5.

every day i feel like we're experiencing some kind of societal gas leak

There are a lot of well-meaning guidelines on suicide prevention that frankly should not apply when the government is intentionally causing a suicide epidemic in a specific minority population.

Image from the illuminated edition of the Trump Bible.

I feel like some White House reporter needs to ask Trump about the fact that his DOJ has lost 16 straight cases to access state voter rolls and that in 7 of the cases it was before judges he nominated. Oh and point out that I am still not tired of winning.

Furious that Chris Nolan would disregard historical accuracy in adapting The Odyssey by making a "movie" with "cameras" instead of memorizing the entire story and then going on a nationwide tour to sing it to us while tripping on ergotized barley

I can't breathe the air, I can't eat lettuce, I can't afford gas, and my kids have measles. But at least now our soldiers will have enough testosterone.

The theme of this World Cup is Countries Where People Eat Dinner Two Hours Later Than I Personally Prefer

Brits are like “Look who’s boiling vegetables now.”

i stand corrected

let this be a lesson to deal with your feelings of gender anxiety and masculine inadequacy with a hobby or therapy or something and not a high stakes senate election

new metaphor just dropped

Are we just throwing sentence structure out the window, or

yeah, I recently had multiple people in China ask me why they never seem to meet Trump supporters, and I pointed out that the Trump supporters tend to be too afraid to travel abroad (outside of a few select places in Western Europe and full-service Caribbean resorts).

The ideological cousin of “the media isn’t telling us about this” which may actually drive me mad one day, bc it’s usually said about something reported on by multiple huge media outlets and means “no one delivered this to my social media feeds in way that captured my severely diminished attention.”

"we weren't taught x in school" online always is - because x is not true - because you personally don't remember x but it was very much something you should have gathered from your lectures and readings - because x is specialized knowledge beyond the scope of the curriculum and you do not read books

Someday, with luck and hard work, she will have a name too.

Exactly one year ago today:

Everyone please welcome CBS News Immigration Analyst Viktor Orban.

Sounds like FDR’s “Brain Trust,” except I’m not sure who his “manosphere shepherd” was and Roosevelt’s Four Sons would not have been able to attend the fights with him during WWII because they were serving in the armed forces.

I did a bunch of yard work, took a shower, plopped on the bed, and my kid apparently started a dryer load of rocks in the basement directly underneath my room.

Aide: sir you were supposed to choose ONE of the talking points

Now do the Department of Defense

"Why don't Americans–" Motherfucker, I live in Minneapolis

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. This video is one of the best representations of why so many women don’t come forward. It’s quick, please share widely. We must continue to demand the release of the full #EpsteinFiles. This video is heartbreaking to hear the seats creak as people sit down

i want to thank the neighborhood brass band for playing "war pigs" when we turned the kids loose for the easter egg hunt yesterday

To everyone celebrating Easter, Michelle and I wish you a joyful holiday filled with reminders of the enduring power of faith and hope.

Mockingbirds really are assholes.