Agitator (outside/inside)

He’s just mad about Christian Titties

As a former teacher, I never scrubbed in for a gender reassignment surgery, but I did instruct the kids on how to get the window screens off in case of an active shooter…

Show me a picture on your phone that has your energy, but isn’t a selfie

If you replied to this post with a sincere defense of Audi, please take some time this week to reevaluate your life

Add “between my legs” to a movie title. Meet The Fockers Between My Legs

Add "between my legs" to a movie title. There Will Be Blood Between My Legs

I’ve seen enough. Mac Jones made Sark look like a genius.

liberty mutual was the only advertiser who stuck with tucker carlson after he said mexicans were "filth" so whatever fantasies you have about torturing the mascot are morally correct

stop capitulating to people that hate you and want you gone, stop pretending that you dont know what their motives are i am begging you

Spoiler: This has jack shit to do with the border.

I’ve been telling my kids forever “Create something you love and you’ll be surprised how many people love it too. Be someone you love and you’ll be surprised how many people love it too.”

11yo: Hopefully [my teacher] will like my project. Me: Do *you* like your project? 11yo: Yes. Me: Do you think you tried your best? 11yo: Yes. Me: Well then, let me tell you a secret. If that's the case, then it really doesn't matter a damn bit what your teacher thinks of it. :)

It saddens me, bc I know folks going great and important work in the AHA, but the leadership is just flailing around and grasping onto the worst possible options

Russia used to help Iran, they still do but they used to too.

We already have flying cars. They're called helicopters. They're really expensive and there are good reasons you have to have a pilot license and work with air traffic control to fly them. Putting jets on a sedan is not going to result in a better vehicle or transportation experience in any way.

People underestimate the ability of wild horses to drag them away. It's pretty much exactly what they're built for.

Lincoln: “This nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom” Kennedy: “Ask not what your country can do for you” Reagan: “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” Trump: "I examined his ass"

I haven’t seen this many Tennessee and Auburn fans this happy since 1/6/2021

Quit taking pictures! Live your life, savor the moment.. then write a bestseller but do you name it “I Don’t Care. Do You?” Or “When You’re a Tiger They Just Let You Do It”

You're a guard at the Yorkshire Wildlife Park and Donald Trump is being mauled by a tiger. You can either save the president or shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo; do you select high contrast color film, or do you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?

Something very important to figure out before Jan 20, 2029 is whether, when a new President is inaugurated, they will control the computer system at GSA (i.e. doors to federal buildings) and Treasury payments system or if those systems will be somehow in the hands of DOGE cronies

The US and the West welcomed Russia into the community of nations after the Cold War. Investment poured in. The G7 turned into G8. The idea that Poland, Estonia, etc. forming their own foreign relations was so unfair to Moscow that Russia is entitled to murder Ukrainians 20 years later is insane.

bluesky is using AI, fourthwall is using AI, patreon is using AI, twitch is using AI, my tiny german internet host in the middle of nowhere is using AI - unfortunately everything tech related will be touched by this shit somehow. all you can do is disable it best you can and tell them it sucks

About 10 years ago I was in that centrist mindset of “make compromises” but as I thought on it it occurred to me like a flash “They shouldn’t make all these waves they need to compromise.. on their right to exist, human dignity” My heart dropped. No person should make that compromise nor be asked to

I only had one night to learn how to read.

Parents, if you have dropped off a kid named Jimmy in the morning and picked up a kid named Janet at the end of the school day, please return to the school: You've driven off with some other family's child.

Of all the Barbies, my least favorite is Press Secretary Barbie.

This is the good stuff

They are so morally bankrupt that they don’t even know what a valid point sounds like. Lashing out is a bad thing but I bet he understands that when it comes to disadvantaged minorities.

This is what happens when you let dweeb incel shit-posters out of their mom’s basement

JD Vance: "I love you too sir. In a totally platonic way, to be clear. I'm the vice president, not James Talarico."

I'm glad he wrote this down! It could be incredibly ironic some day

talk to em mother

I said this in a thread last night and in a thousand threads before it, but you really are doing the work of those who would destroy democracy and the rule of law when you are a doomer. You can be aware of — and vigorously oppose — the lawlessness of this administration without insisting on doom.

Sex so bad you skip faking orgasm and go straight to faking your own death

Kirby Smart always looks like he’s trying to explain that you can’t triple stamp a double stamp.

That’s it I’ve seen enough! Time for BAMA to pull the starters. There’s no glory to beating UGA in the regular season. Let’s take the night off.

Qanon has nothing to do on a house full of SEC fans drinking and grilling all day.