rustytrawler.bsky.social

Bluesky has two kinds of users.

Show us your tanks! A Leman Russ proxy for my Tallarn 7th Regiment. #Warhammer40k

I saw Mitch McConnell drinking a piña colada at Trader Vic’s, and his hair was perfect

new metaphor just dropped

He really is a make-a-wish kid lol

The end of American Empire was always going to be ugly, stupid, and self-inflicted. There was just no other way.

I feel like they’re slowly easing us into depression era cooking so we’ll be ready when it all falls apart. When we see a recipe for vinegar pie or Hoover stew in the Times cooking section we’ll know the end is nigh.

I would hire super stable genius Elon Musk to build a hyper loop under the strait.

It’s time to mobilize ICE and send them on an unsupported landing of Iran’s coast. They want to play soldier let them go play soldier. There’s gotta be some Higgins boats in mothball somewhere.

Honestly this is super reminiscent of how Trump managed his business interests. When you have a problem, shuffle it into a purposely confusing web of LLCs and hope people forget about it.

China has to be thinking about moving up its Taiwan timeline now, right? We’re going to be using a lot of our limited munition stockpiles blowing up schools in Iran and fighting some sort of fucked up drone swarm version of the Tanker War to keep the Straits of Hormuz open.

Glad the Super Bowl is over so we can move on to the next moral panic. Surely something will happen at the Olympics that Republican ‘thought leaders’ can feign anger at.

This guy is lucky he got a job when he did. DHS can’t be more than six months away from using phrenology to screen candidates.

okay hear me out

we're getting all the downsides of cyberpunk (social alienation, ruthless hyper capitalism, digital mass surveillance state) but none of the promised upsides (cheap street food, cool jackets, super drugs that make you really fast and strong before they kill you)

Hell yeah

All hat and no neurons

Columbus is a cursed place.

Nice break from existential dread this evening. The kind of night that makes you want to buy yourself a nice steak instead of green tip 5.56 and pressure dressings.

It's going to be so amazing being alive in 2026 because the front page will say "BREAKING Mamdani Received Free Cheese Pizza From a Local Vendor, Calls to Resign Mount" and then on page 3 you'll see "Hegseth's Pentagon Rape Dungeon Raises Legal Questions."

So it seems like a pretty safe assumption at this point that Stephen Miller is feeding Grandpa McRanty AI videos.

*record scratch* *freeze frame* Yep, that's me. You're probably wondering how I got here.

The Rapture seems like it was a disappointment, as usual. Guess I’ll just have to sit back and wait on Trickle Down Economics ® to get myself a Trump Bible, an anti-materiel rifle and a jet ski.

Cool cool so now I’m going to have to tell family members that I’m giving their family member ‘acetaminophen’instead of Tylenol because Tylenol causes autism and the woke mind virus? I already have it avoid the calling fentanyl fentanyl because the ‘F’ word and induces panic.

If the Raptue doesn’t happen tomorrow I’m gonna be bummed. Dealing with these shitty exurban megachurch fucks is fucking exhausting.

I’ve gotten two spam texts from the Widow Kirk. Even in death his grift lives on.

Seems like that gullible dumbass that got herself shot on January 6th is out and Kirk is in as the GOP’s Horst Wessel. Wonder if he’ll get a song?

Sen. Ruben Gallego: "Today we had a chance to stand with the brave men and women who made the ultimate sacrifice for this country in uniform. Ashli Babbitt is not that. She is a traitor. She will be a traitor. She died a traitor."

To be fair, when your screen time is largely spent browsing Grindr and then guiltily pretending to read a Bible quote app it doesn’t leave much time for keeping up with the news

we'll know it's for real when Fox News starts playing Lee Greenwood's rendition of "Swan Lake" on loop

One of my patients had Fox on last night and holy fuck. I don’t watch Fox, or any cable news really, so I forget how batshit crazy it is.

The last time I watched a late night show I was in junior high school and it was Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon. I feel a little left out of the Colbert discourse.

When me and my crew roll up on you

I can’t get over Trump stealing that soccer trophy. Like, I get that it’s small potatoes compared to the policies his administration has been enacting that are quite literally killing people, but it’s just so fucking indescribably bizarre.

‘Proud to be an American’ makes my skin crawl.

Last 4th of July I felt really subdued and reflective. I’m not really one for performative patriotism anyway, but it really felt like possibly my last 4th living in country that, while far from perfect, wasn’t completely fucked. Glad I’m working this year so I can just kinda tune it out.

Was stopped at a light behind a car with vanity plates that read TREE LWN and a bumper sticker that said ‘Make Tree Lawns Great Again’ and I desperately want to meet this person.

Pretty excited that we’re about to pump 60+ billion dollars into the agency that makes the people sniffing your shoes at the airport look like James fucking Bond.

Welp guess I’m glad I’ve been pounding out overtime the last few months. If this fuckshow embarrassment gets through the House (and it will), hospitals are going to absolutely haemorhage money.

crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their consultants

This is DUI foreign policy. The driver himself is happy, relaxed and confident in his abilities. It's everyone else who's tense and waiting for the inevitable crash.

I’ll say it again: It was a huge mistake for Congress to abolish itself.