Patrick Pipino

Average Trump scandal: many people dead after uncontroversial government program illegally cut by doge for nonexistent savings Average mamdani scandal: he’s playing BASKETBALL with his FRIENDS

The dude’s spiraling will get worse over the next week. Severe sleep deprivation plus sundowning plus stimulant abuse equals complete meltdown.

Imagine you call in Trump to campaign as a last ditch effort and he tells everybody you’re going to lose and starts talking about hot men’s asses instead

What is your favorite meme/Onion headline about your profession? theonion.com/cdc-official...

Government help pays off for all of us.

It’s amazing how angry MAGA is about today’s No Kings events, where people showed up and encouraged others to vote.

Spot on.

For those playing at home, a "Zacharia" is roughly 1/2 a "Scaramucci." .45 if you want to get technical.

Ruin a book by adding a word: "The Count of Monte Cristo Sandwiches"

Ruin a book by adding a word: "One Flew Standby Over the Cuckoo's Nest"

Ruin a book by adding a word: "The Edge Lord of the Rings"

Ruin a book by adding a word: Pride Parade and Prejudice

Clever.

All things considered, I'd be much happier if Rachel Campos Duffy-and her troglodytic husband, were put on a rocket, and launched directly toward the sun.

Add Los Angeles and San Diego to the list of "Things that are expendable" to cover up the Epstein files, and a supremely fucked up war in Iran.

Fuckin' perfection.

you can’t pay for gas or groceries but here’s a few rolls of quarters, don’t forget to vote republican or something

Call me crazy but I'm disinclined to take religious advice from a twice divorced, thrice married drunkard who drugged a woman and sexually assaulted her, whose own mother calls him a predator, and who gleefully works for a urine-soaked rapist & pedophile. www.military.com/hegseths-new...

In a normal administration counterintelligence agents at the FBI would be investigating this photo. In this administration, the FBI director is in the photo.

This is hilarious to me.

I postulate that he thinks it's the only way he has any legacy at all that isn't equated with failure, and grift. Like the coward he is, it's the cowardly way out.

By fighting it And by Trump listening to groups who advocated fighting it And by undermining the diplomatic success that avoided it www.fdd.org/analysis/202...

"Outer Rim Monetary Policy: Why Imperial Credits are losing out to pirates who barter in Kessel based Spice."

Props to the many delegates from other countries for not laughing-or simply getting up and walking out-which is what I would have done.

Rubio will go down as the most inconsequential SecState in history. Bank on it.

You know what? It's been awhile since Mr. Trump has made a "your favorite President" post. The time is right for him to dust off that shitpoasting gem and bring it back. Tired: "Thank you for your attention to this matter." Wired: "Your favorite President."

They were cool with the racism, sexism, bigotry, corruption, dismantling of social services and common decency, burning every ally, shooting American citizens in the face in the street, the insurrection, Trump being besties with Epstein etc etc. But once the price of gas got too high it was over.

Donald Trump: "I'm going to raise tariffs and start a war to make everything more expensive for no reason." MAGA: "I can't afford to support my family because Joe Biden made schoolchildren trans."

After insisting that Biden bore blame for an international economic crisis caused by a pandemic that unfolded on Trump's watch, Republicans are now trying to persuade voters *not* to blame Trump for a worse crisis he deliberately created through unneeded wars and tariffs. Good luck with that!

Email from my grandfather, who likes to say he's lived for a third of the time that America has existed: "America was nice while it lasted, although it's really hard to believe a criminal narcissist TV show host that paints himself orange was all it took to take us down."

"Mr. President, as head of the 'Leopards Eating Faces' Party, we are dismayed that you and your goons are eating our faces."

Hey, look... Dukakis is driving the tank again.

So we changed the Department of Defense to the Department of War and then started a not war for the purposes of defense?

"Kash Patel makes it legal for FBI agents to have fucked dogs" is a good one, I have to admit. I can already tell this one has staying power.

What an absolute fucking spineless weasel this Temu Keebler elf is.

How is this not a violation of the Outer Space Treaty?

Post a banger, not in English... www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6hG...

The experiment visited upon us by too many of our fellow citizens to put the dumbest American who also thinks he’s an expert on every subject in charge of our govt is not going well. bsky.app/profile/atru...

This might be my favorite BlueSky post of all time.

Make a band edible. R.E.M&M's

Rejoice rubes, for the hour of everlasting wealth is at hand...

Crazy day for “Imagine if Obama had” comparisons.

If Barack Obama had done this, every Sunday show would have talked about nothing else.

An Amazon cargo plane kills people at Miami International Airport and Democratic gubernatorial candidate Dr. Amy Acton is attacked, but Trump is much more concerned about changing "New Mexico" to "New America." Just another day in whatever this country may be called in a few weeks.

Just glad we didn't elect a woman president so we didn't get trivial nonsense about what color her hair is today or how much make up she's using.

Worst gay porno ever made.

This.

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