Walnuts

Perfect

I missed the news that Rodders won the Balloon Door yesterday. Well in

Payrick McGoohan is the wrong un in Columbo again today. That's two out of the last three I've seen. No wonder him and Peter Falk were such good mates

Hitting a man repeatedly on the head with a bottle, then throwing in a few punches for good measure, and doing this with a previous history of violence. Guilty. Walk free and sign a few autographs on the way out for fans who are there to support you because you're a singer. You cunt.

Jesus Christ. Buy gold. And toilet rolls.

If patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel, then "performative pietism" is surely the panic room inside.

Bolsonaro-friendly mayors appear to be sabotaging public transport on Election Day. Buses aren’t running in Lula-friendly areas, flights and ferries mysteriously canceled. Traffic lights have gone out and people’s power cut in Salvador, indigenous people’s travel restricted

John Peel passed away on this day in 2004 in memory of him here’s a link to Dave Strickson’s archive with over a thousand Peel Sessions each with accompanying YouTube clips Enjoy davestrickson.blogspot.com/2020/05/john...

Any Welsh speakers? What does that say?

Hey Siri, show me what a group of rancid fucking hypocrites looks like.

Manchester United defender Harry Maguire pictured during his side's 3-0 defeat to Bournemouth at Old Trafford:

With just six half-hour episodes, POLICE SQUAD remains, pound for pound, the single funniest television program ever produced.

“He’s got the White House looking like Saddam Hussein opened up a Cheesecake Factory” — Obama

Just started Alice Cooper's autobiography. Already I can tell its going to be excellent. This is NOT going to be the usual "wild men live crazy" rock & roll read.

"Do you have Personal Cheeses by Depeche Mode?"

Burnham and his scouse mate on Gogglebox,worra pair of ruddy bloody lads eh

#TOTP

Gene there, pretending to play bass again

Then maybe don’t send him to bloody boarding school… #Cruelty

Yer Los Lobos fella has got a right sweat on

😳 WOMAN REPORTER: Do sexual abuse allegations mean nothing to you, sir? TRUMP: Wait. Wait! Wait wait wait. Slow down. Who are you with? REPORTER: NBC, sir. But they are very serious sex abuse allegations TRUMP: Quiet! Isn't she a fresh person? You're a horrible little reporter, aren't you?

This new camera angle explains Donald Trump's weird expression.

I don’t care how old this is, I’m howling at it

He is the most pathetic dude imaginable and he lords it over us all! It's so fucking undignified and embarrassing of us, as a society, a species, a planet! Fuck!

How can Blackpool be city of culture when it's not a city??? Amongst other things

A Bank makes £2.3 billion in profits last year, so what do they do? Cut 5000 jobs and use AI instead. Greedy cunts

LOL CLARKSVILLE Republican Rep. Michael Lankford’s mailer complains “Taxes. Gas. Groceries. Everything has gone up!” Quick question — Who’s in charge in Tennessee and 🇺🇸 , Michael? 🤷🏼 (Allie Phillips @allie4tn (D) is his opponent)

Why don't you hack yourself some mates up eh, cybernonces

It feels like a while since we got to celebrate a truly great courtroom artist, so here's one from today's story about "Tommy Robinson" "crying" in court when talking about his family, apparently played in this courtroom sketch by Dunkirk's Mark Rylance

How the hell did they manage to lose in that there crickeet

Ethnic cleansing in broad daylight

Just another day in the corrupt Trump regime

Hard to imagine a more shameless, gaslighting statement is even possible (H/T @acyn.bsky.social )

Witkoff to Putin: “You talk so much about my president, President Trump, being a humanitarian -- you are a humanitarian also, sir, and I salute that.” Britain and the rest of Europe and the free world. We need to uncouple ourselves from the US. They are gone, never to be trusted again.

Who could possibly have known that Biscuit legs Collyer would be knacked for a long stretch after playing a couple of games. Will that club never fucking learn

That response, though. 😅

Alexei Sayle's Stuff (20th October 1988). "Well, we apologise for the absence of Alexei Sayle in this week's edition of Alexei Sayle's Stuff. We're attempting to right the problem, but in the meantime the programme will continue in Leslie Crowther only".

Top Tip Pretend you live in Midsomer, by killing the local vicar with a box jellyfish attached to a radio controlled helicopter.

I love the “not everyone can afford headphones” line. As if it’s obligatory to play shitty TikTok’s on public transport and you can’t possibly be expected to go 10 minutes without assaulting your eyeballs with mindless crap

So AI is deciding from a photo of a person if it's worth treating any serious illness they have? Well that all seems fine