The Hornéd One

@dennisgoris.bsky.social

A reminder, because it is almost that time of year: More children are killed by cars on Halloween than any other day of the year, by far. www.vox.com/future-perfe... If you're a parent, I hope you'll do what you can to keep kids safe. If you're driving on Saturday, PLEASE exercise extra caution.

It's that special time of year when they give the danger-kitties pumpkins to play with at The Wildcat Sanctuary in Sandstone, Minnesota. A much-needed timeline cleanse. 🐯🎃 (📷: wildcatsanctuary.org)

Nasty bug

These ginger cuties are Punch & Pickles, two of our newest rescue kittens. Currently, we are drowning in kittens again and we’ve completely run out of foster spots. Not to mention, finding adoptive homes is becoming more challenging by the day. 💔 #OrangeKitten #RescueKitten #CatsOfBluesky

incredible strategic error by Pat McAfee to reveal he is deeply bothered by relatively mild mockery from college students despite a key component of his job being "standing on a stage in front of college students for 3 hours a week"

you shouldn't talk about the intellectual capacity of 500,000,000 Arabs unless you can write 500,000,000 using something other than Arabic numerals

Add "between my legs" to a movie title: JAWS BETWEEN MY LEGS

I don't know that there is a definitive line to cross that makes you say, "I live in a police state now" but when masked gunmen can routinely brutalize the public, citizen or immigrant alike, with impunity, you have reached that point.

Uhhhhhhh

Bluesky has four kinds of users

I solved the daily #CluesBySam, Oct 26th 2026 (Easy), in less than 10 minutes 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 cluesbysam.com

checking in on the president of the united states

please say it’s twizzlers please say it’s twizzlers please say it’s t

I fucking hate transphobes.

I think the fact that Marissa Mayer would voluntarily disclose this to a reporter is a pretty good demonstration of how deeply the culture of Silicon Valley has diverged from the rest of humanity

This is just pure racism. Republicans objectively are campaigning on little more than bigotry.

Casting the first stone must feel so good when you are without sin

Check out how easy this is.

Yes, PLEASE GO VOTE. MONICA WOULD WANT YOU TO VOTE!

It's 10 o'clock in the morning on October the 24th, if you want to know.

Thank you for your servants.

What if Minilla decided to go no-contact with his famous Kaiju father

Bad / girly / gay: BICYCLES Good / manly / warrior class: BALLROOMS

This is fun - to find out your wizard name, carefully write out your real current name then right after that add “the Wizard.” We did this at a party last week and had some big laughs.

Yeah, this is just a horror movie waiting to happen.

In the wake of all this, I hope that at the very least, we never see another think piece lambasting adult children for cutting off ties with their parents.

People are like "be careful of that trans woman, she was socialised male so she's dangerous" and then you look at her and see the most timid creature in the world who has never heard "I love you" from someone who didn't hurt her

which trump son is driving the truck

JK Rowling writing a whole damn essay that goes, "I know I'm a billionaire, but it's the TRANS who are the real elite, and I'm just using all my money to fight the TRANS ELITE whose only tangible power I can articulate they have outside vague fearmongering is them harassing me on Twitter!" is wild.

Matt, Emmy & Chris are BACK with an all-new Movies Are Dumb, this time taking on the John Carradine D-flick, BILLY THE KID VERSUS DRACULA! Premieres Nov 10 in the Clubhouse | Download Nov 12 WANNA TRY TO WIN A FREE DOWNLOAD? Like and reply below and we'll choose a winner at random on Mon!

Murder kit nearly complete.

So, I made one mistake. I'm still pretty proud of myself for this one. I solved the daily #CluesBySam, Oct 23rd 2026 (Hard), in less than 8 minutes 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟨🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 cluesbysam.com

holy smokes, conan strikes up a chat with a random lady on the subway and she immediately starts riffing on his level, no problem.

Tragedy stuck today as a group of Halloween partiers were found dead by a man walking his very cute dog this morning. Police say they will need the publicist help to bring the perpetrators of this "horrorshow" to justice Pictured- the gruesome scene and the last known photo of the partiers.

*record scratch* *freeze frame* Yep, that's me.