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Nope

He was dead on about the metaverse, I’m sure this is true as well

bullshit

So he can steal our brains. Fuck him.

Are you stupid?

How about conscience-aware humans instead?

Jesus, these tech bros are such fucking idiots.

LIKE I DON'T THINK THAT'S WORTH THE EFFORT OF A WRITEUP.

Whoa! That's amazing! Hey listen, I got these magic beans and I'm willing to sell them for a song. DM if interested

I hate how these godforsaken tech celebrities are just allowed to make wildly fabulous claims they'll never actually deliver on with no consequence. Anyways, For any serious computing task? You can pry my keyboard, mouse, and windowing interface from my cold, dead hands.

Good thing that Zuckerberg guy is always truthful and has our best interests at heart. Otherwise, this headline would be terrifyingly corrupt.

Yea but he doesn't know shit about anything

🤪🤡

Google tried to make the glasses-as-computers a thing. That went great for them. I am myopic and I need my glasses to remain just glasses so I can avoid tech bros in the wild.

Will i be able to use those smart glasses while browsing the metaverse?

Bro they gonna work, bro, I swear, bro. Just one more time bro, I feel it, bro, the glasses are gonna work, trust me bro, this is the one, bro.

so now he's punny... or did he steal that line too?

You know what? I hope he succeeds. I hope he does the impossible. Why? Because the first thing a superintelligent AI would do is eliminate capitalism and the power of people like Mark Zuckerberg, not create more shareholder value lol

It’s insane to me that stock prices can rise or even stabilize because some nut job with a history of failing his ambitious projects says he has a new ambitious project. Why are stock holders so gullible. Look at results not promises please I beg you (them).

Glasses? The things Zuck has been trying to push on the world for years? You should put an adult content warning when you're transcribing and publishing people's wet dreams.

At this point, they are basically unable to stop claiming to have invented perpetual motion, because if their tales are not tall enough, their stock price will fall and then they'll get eaten by a bigger blowhard.

BREAKING NEWS: Lying asshole freak lies once again

Motherfucker can't even get regular intelligence in sight

No one wants to look like that idiot in those stupid glasses. F-You Zuckerberg

Who’s up for a Butlerian Jihad?

So the super-nerds will still be specky twats to everyone else.

He's only saying that because he wants us to buy his glasses.

Stop trying to make dorkglasses happen.

y'know i'm a clueless dipshit who can talk out their ass too and i charge way less for a soundbite than zuck does

Zuckerberg says oh shit a manhole I hope I don't fall into AAAAHHHHHHHH

It's becoming very clear to me that billionaires have no idea how much disposable income the median American has.

I’ll take regular intelligence and not looking like a twat, thanks.

Boy howdy, am I not seeing superintelligence ANYWHERE in sight these days.

Translation: “No, really, my glasses are going to be good this time!”

When personal superintelligence cums

If the glasses are super intelligent they'll tell us we're morons for giving money to a sociopathic dick like Zuckerberg and voting in a bunch of hateful cretins before vanishing into hyperspace on the way to somewhere as far from humans as possible.

Get back to me when the glasses start cutting through propaganda & bullshit

Great. I can’t wait to take over the world by doing nothing more than being aware of my surroundings instead of reading shit that is being plastered on the lenses of my glasses

You know you don't have to uncritically report everything billionaire shitheads say, right? Especially when it's obviously an attempt to sell some shitty shades?

Wow. I hate everything abt that man. I can’t think of any redeeming qualities. I wish he’d stumble into a ditch, die in agony, then get eaten by scavengers. What an utterly useless human.

When this bubble pops, I expect very high profile prosecutions.

Some billionaire asshole says something stupid as fuck so you print it as a legitimate story?

Sure we could spend the time and money to with towards feeding the unfed, housing the unhoused, and working on reversing climate change, but let's do this instead.

Nope. As if people who wear contacts will say, Hey, I want to wear glasses again -hahah

His statement reeks of "Please, please let this be true, I've invested so much of my personal ego into it 🥺"

Source: The MetaVerse guy

Oh wow it’s amazing Meta just happens to be investing in the one thing that *definitely* going to be the next major computer platform.

And you folks believe this huh? Just gonna repeat it without a thought in your head? Can't evaluate it yourself whether it's true or not?

Oh from the company "Meta"? Interesting, is that named after the hundred billion dollar dead product that they thought would be the inevitable future a few years ago? Huh I wonder if that tells us anything about their foresight

"Henry Ford says model t real close to breaking the sound barrier"

that’s probably not gonna be true

Zuck’s record on predicting the future isn’t exactly stellar. Weren’t we all meant to be hanging out in the metaverse by now?

has this particular person, this...mark zumberg? not sure. point is, has this person made predictions in the past? how have they played out? going to go use my VR headset to use the number one platform of young people, facebook, to get the answer.

They’re calling him the most out of touch man of all time

the upper classes have been declaring their superintelligence for centuries it's not getting any more believable

Says the man who pissed away BILLIONS on a Second Life knock-off. He's a pillock. A rich, ignorant, selfish pillock, but a pillock nonetheless.

let's keep listening to the guy that burned 60 billion dollars lmfao

Everyone will want to buy my dorky glasses, says dorky glasses salesman.

He has been so right with these predictions!

Why post obvious lies and garbage?

We’re heading straight for full time helmets with an AI representation of your facial expressions aren’t we?

This is fucking marketing and the person who wrote about it isn't qualified to write about tech if they couldn't figure that out

Let’s just get regular intelligence first, maybe?

The metaverse is going to change everything guys, honest.

"Pretty soon, in just five years, I will have developed self-serving, ice cream. That's right, it sounds impossible, but I, a tech genius, have figured out how to get ice cream, to serve itself. Now just invest 40 Billions of dollars, so we can bring the future of Fully Self Service Ice cream."

Rich people doesn't care about improving people's life quality, that's why in fiction we can only imagine the future like a dystopia with huge technological improvements but never solving poverty.

Lol. Lmfao even

Yeah yeah, old news. @howardtayler.bsky.social already predicted this

A hearty fuck that guy

Mark Zuckerberg misses his Google Glass, what a dork.

Hey everybody, the dimwit who spent billions of dollars on the fucking Metaverse has another ridiculous idea. Let's all take it seriously!

"we're so sure about this we are renaming the company -- Super Context Aware Technologies. SCAT"

So more lies from a creepy shitbag

Tech media forever playing the role of slack-jawed villager

Zuckerberg is the cheap flimsy Walmart version of an oligarch. I wouldn’t listen to anything he says.

Lmao. You guys you really don't have to play stenographer for Zuck.

Fact there's still so many "journalists" just unquestioningly regurgitating word for word any techbro's total fantasy they can't possibly deliver on for products nobody wants, is wild

It's time we convince these people that their consciousness can be uploaded, strap them to a gurney with a bunch of electrodes on their heads and bring out the nuematic bolt gun. Then maybe we'll get the future we've been dreaming of.

Who gives a fuck if he said that?

Can't help thinking about The Diamond Age and how Primers worked in that book, every time I hear one of these billionaires talk about how amazing their AI is.

Has anyone asked him what intelligence means?

Do you guys use your phones to remember to breathe also?

And when it doesn’t?

He is so fucking high..

Claims man who murdered a competitor's smart glasses product that beat him to market by 10 years, only to hype his own (way shittier) smart glasses now.

are you really this dumb

That ain't happening. He just says whatever makes the value of his stock rise.

In the metaverse right

He couldn't develop legs for a VR chat app, Zuck is incompetent and not capable of delivering state-of-the-art tech.

Fuck you.

Zuckerberg is an idiot if he thinks that. He is more likely drifting more defense money to support the failing AI business model

I’d settle for these clowns to have average intelligence

lol no

just one more data center bro

Shut the fuck up

From the people who brought you legs in the metaverse after sinking billions into it

Oh, that's convenient, Mark! And, you know, just curious, who happens to sell that technology you think is gonna be so very helpful? You? Oh wow, that's so great for you!

First, define intelligence. Zuck has no idea what the fuck he's talking about. Likewise, Altman said a few months ago that super intelligence was months away. Meanwhile, google AI summaries are consistently laughably wrong. The tech bros are NOT ok.

*corporate and profiteering journalism!

Tech investors for financial corporations are a close second.

Publishers are starving them into doing it

I don't think they even believe it themselves. They're simply carrying on the tradition of taking notes on everything rich people say. Every billionaire is an oracle to them.

Republicans. Even the most simple of lies... "When you're rich they let you grab them by the pu**y." "I never went to Epstein Island." "The key to the Dems are the Epstein files." Okay, let's make him President. <--Republicans

tech executives

I think that ‘anyone’ indicates *people* though. 😒

Maybe if they didn't have the memory of a goldfish.

I love how the criticism that "holy shit, this looks like a bad wii game" clearly upset him because VERY SHORTLY after that went viral they changed the style

Well, he is an idiot, so

who even are you guys and why are you running plays for these inhumane dorks

Zuckerberg is a dipshit.

Zuck seems to want so bad to be seen as a tech visionary like Steve Jobs. He’s not even close.

Wait, I’ll get in my robo taxi to the meta verse. What a load of rubbish

Won’t happen

Yeah, I hope you're right. The only thing that scares me more than the thought of SkyNet really existing is the idea that it's developed by gormless billionaires with no moral perspective or intellectual depth whatsoever.

What's the price you charge to parrot Meta talking points?

Hmmm. The problem with this is when you hear Zuckerberg speak and he sounds... not super intelligent, to say the least.