Rachel

Motion to stop getting a separate "you are now unsubscribed" text when you text STOP to unsubscribe

Do better, @apnews.com

Parisiens, quelle est l’ambiance à Paris aujourd’hui ? A-t-on l’impression d’une révolution à l’échelle de toute la ville, ou bien le chaos se limite-t-il à un petit coin précis ?

You know who else believed he could fly? R. Kelly.

The cat is quite concerned that something might happen to the counselors at Camp Crystal Lake.

Holy shit.

Have any of you seen the new Netflix Unibomber movie? I've never seen a film that straight up encouraged violent revolution before. 🫨

Good. Damn good.

I've seen enough zombie movies to let me know Mitch Connell is more dangerous than ever.

My 16 y.o. is currently making pho with his buddies. The kids are alright.

Opening DMs like

Heading back to (American) school like...

Can we talk about how Adam's underwear were showing through his ratty pants? #MAFS

Why is there a line outside of Best Buy like it's 1996?

You are so big time, @seananmcguire.bsky.social!

Got a new book at the library. Outside, I picked mountains of blackberries. A band started up in the park. Off to meet an old friend for a walk by the beach. This is the suburban version of "Today was a Good Day."

May you all feel this safe and relaxed this caturday.

Sitting two feet from the stage for Amanda Knox's one woman show. Really glad she's NOT a murderer.

Guys, I think I found aliens on my stargazing app.

Spoiled cat finds his throne

SNL season premiere with an Odyssey parody traveling to Hades to find Mitch McConnell

Do you get a lot of extra gunshot training in veterinary school? TV has taught me your friends will bring you gunshot victims at least once a week.

Folks, Trump and MAGA aren't leaving legally or peacefully. I wish more people would talk about this. They are literally sharing their supervillain plot in the open.

You mean to tell me the halftime show had Shakira and the muppets and they did t have fozzie bear singing Waka Waka?

Is the Odyssey the loudest movie of all time, or was just that our theater? I liked it, but the book was quieter.

Curious to hear Mitch McConnell's comments on the passing of Lindsey Graham.

We should invent a kind of canceling where the guy goes away

There's an episode of "Worst Neighbor Ever" where an old man goes missing. The cops keep asking his "estate trustee" to see him. She keeps saying she just spoke to him and he's fine. Spoiler: He was NOT fine. This post is about Mitch McConnell.

Goodnight, Bluesky. May you sleep as well as my cat.

Working up my scouting report for every male lead in a Hallmark movie.

Thank you to Paris for hosting me during the World Cup nearly 30 years ago. Glad Seattle could finally return the favor of hosting the party.

Old D.C.

Do you think they tried to spell the movie Se7en as "SeVIIn," but decided we were too stupid to get it?

In dark times, I cling to these pure moments of joy. 🎉🎉🎉🎉 ...And stay the fuck out, douche clowns.

Schrondinger's Mitch McConnell

3 incumbents with establishment backing, corporate PAC money, AIPAC support, and Hakeem Jeffries endorsements. All 3 lost. Every candidate Mamdani endorsed won. Nearly 40 states still have primaries. If you liked what you saw in New York, here's how you can help take it nationwide.

Someone has been projecting images all over D.C. “It’s swampier than ever.” The Kennedy Center one is pretty hilarious. 😂😂😂

the brady bunch relies upon the early deaths of two parents. beneath your frivolous merriment there lies a foundation of bones

Like twice a day now I read a headline that makes me remember that time I went to Versailles with my mom, and she looked around and went, “They had it coming.”

It’s been five years since Alex Jones lost InfoWars to the Sandy Hook families. As the verdict came down, he asked: “Do these people actually believe they’re getting any money?” He hasn't paid them a penny. Well, The Onion is going pay them anyway. The new InfoWars begins July 2nd at 8 p.m. ET.

this makes more sense when you remember eric trump was just named to the board of acme scaffolding and tarps

Can confirm this reality. Exhibit A: a text exchange on the way to our high school reunion:

OCEANIA HAS ALWAYS BEEN VERY CLOSE TO A DEAL WITH EURASIA

And this is all by way of saying that sometimes when we're able to choose to stay, we change more lives than we can know, or comprehend. We make ripples we'll never see. It's important. Please stay.

#Backrooms no context spoiler

I'm a white lady going to her first quinceñera. The reception says it starts at 4. When should I really show up? Any other advice?

Hmm...which bus do I choose?

I really don't want to play stick again, but I'm not strong enough to win this staredown.

What in the Epstein? This wording really isn't working for me.