Nick Mao

Is Accidental Partridge still going? "They still walk around like they're King...William"

Genuinely I don't know that it comes across to people who haven't been here to watch how almost unbelievable this was, just people taking something that looked impossible and dragging it kicking and screaming all the way to inevitability.

Absolutely wonderful comment on the Grauniad match report from the Man Utd game yesterday.

Fingers crossed for a decent evening for this vid, if the youtube algo doesn't decide to bail out on me

All I'm saying, Mr Joel, is that for someone who didn't start the fire, you seem to know a heck of a lot about the fire.

Fair play, Elon. This actually looks impressive. Well done.

Doing our bit

Well it's about time

I made a video about that London Batman fella youtu.be/eujNwcfJ6jw

🛟 100 shouts. 65 people helped. 12 lives saved. Congratulations to Brighton RNLI volunteer Chris Townley on his 100th lifeboat call-out! Chris joined with no boating experience and has since spent nearly 15 days at sea helping people in difficulty. A brilliant milestone. Thank you, Chris! ❤️

'Vertical Football' is so-called because you allow your opponent to kick you directly up the arse. #nufc

oh you shitheads #nufc

Big Joe hattrick incoming #nufc

lovely #nufc

Man who won’t give his employees piss breaks claims many piss breaks on the horizon

And the Nobel Prize for Physics is awarded to whoever invented the little bumhole in sauce bottles. Genius.

I worked in wholesale energy markets for 15 years so know what I’m talking about… This is what we should be protesting about. Not boats.

Potatoes, lads.

Also went to Prudhoe Castle, which was cool. I love a castle. I didn't even know this one was here!

Went to that Brockbushes place today. Pretty poor. £20 for this, including £1.50 for a splat of bbq sauce.

😂

Went in the garage. Regretted it.

Liquid Bluesky

We should replace the word Artificial with Super in all instances. eg. "This patient needs Super Respiration immediately!" or "Your mam's new Super Tits look nice."

Lots of lovely new friends today thanks to @robmanuel.b3ta.com 's b3ta list. I've been on worse lists (joke). Hello!

God, grant me the courage to change the things I can and incredible new powers to change the things I can't.

Manchester City should ask the electorate of Clacton if they are guilty or not.

Been watching In The Night Garden with the granddaughter. Waiting for them to go home now so I can have my Tomblibooze.

After 2 years I finally got over 1000 subscribers on my side hustle youtube channel. Now I need the merely quadruple my watch hours and ill be eligible for monetization!

After 12 years, justice has finally been served. Cheick Tioté’s volley against Man City has been retrospectively awarded as part of the 115-charge investigation. Score corrected to 1–1 ✅

All joking aside, we probably should just relegate Everton

On the whole, I think humanity has more chance of being destroyed by old men with nuclear weapons than by the 6-finger-picture machine.

1/23 Sorry, this will be long... There is a lot of shouting about what happened in the Channel yesterday. So I want to go back to basic law. Not immigration policies or political rhetoric. At sea, the starting point is simple: Preservation of life comes first under all maritime conventions.

(chef's kiss)

There’s a 10% chance that Furbies may eradicate humanity says CEO of Furbies PLC

Enjoying MOTD. Hows it gannin, Bruno? Do ya love ya new cloob? 😂

Man who supported Brexit then fucked off to Monaco to avoid contributing a penny of his £15 billion fortune to public services makes the mistake of thinking anyone gives a shit what he thinks.

Thought the ref was giving himself a yellow there 😂 #nufc

what a shot Joe willock

Your Grandad Cyclops talks about his school days

Who's this young bloke Hopey keeps putting on his thumbnails? 😂

Wake up Matty, I think i got something to say to you. What a shit show. Apart from Horny and Hall, I've got nothing good to say. im going to bed.