jon.porter

I wrote about being chronically single, and about visiting a psychic to find out what's broken about me. she had some interesting things to say! johnpaulbrammer.substack.com/p/the-most-u...

#CelebrityTraitors

There's one recruiter on LinkedIn that a) proudly boasts about using AI to screen applications and b) has a horrid bright little HDR profile icon, and honestly I've never longed more for a block button for LinkedIn's jobs board

sorry to the haters but the CORRECT order to play the series is A Short Hike Big Walk Marathon

This note gets it just right. You apologise for eating the plums, express sympathy for their owner and explain your motivation for eating them. Just one note: consider offering to replace the plums. This small gesture could do a lot to smooth things over

People don’t talk about it much, but in the final years before the fall of the Roman Empire people got REALLY into collecting giant novelty popcorn buckets

look, I just think it's weird that we don't spell it "super dooper"

there is simply no love purer than the little nod shared between two bus drivers passing each other on the street

I’m not kidding when I say that all work in the office just ground to a halt for a full minute while we all watched The Blimp fly by

iron rule of British politics is even if a guy who dresses as a bin becomes prime minister he will have been to Oxbridge

Nobody: Absolutely no one: Not a single soul on this earth: r/bicycling: What if I filmed myself cycling from the point of view of my penis?

My most problematic take? Great question. I’d have to say “candy, from a baby.”

Excited for the new Promise Mascot Agency DLC

Me [squinting at the AMF Lager taps with my slightly-too-weak contacts in]: Uh hi could I get an… uh… Alf Lager?

Sick to death of people who claim a journalist must have used AI to write an article when they spot a small mistake. Famously journalists never made factual errors before the invention of ChatGPT.

One of my most sincerely held beliefs is that a lot of culture war nonsense is the direct result of underfunded newsrooms scraping the barrel for column inches every week

Countdown Standard xkcd.com/3232/

"The Scottish island of Summerisle, home of the best fruit in Britain. The first thing you notice? No churches. The farmers here practice a fascinating form of pre-Christian worship…and I just learned I'll be playing the lead role in their annual May Day festival. First stop: my costume fitting."

"It's so refreshing to be cutting about with a boot-full of hammers, battering guys for money" got a good belly-laugh out of me

When I was 27 a woman on the tube asked me about the mobile game I was playing and I earnestly explained the rules of Hitman GO for 10 minutes until she excused herself and went to wait by the door for her stop

The Criterion Collection? What, like all the Burnout games plus the experimental first person shooter "Black"?

Fuck man this is so good

I think this is the correct move by Google. I also think there’s a certain irony in Google penalising AI-generated content whilst its own AI overviews decimate the traffic it sends to sites across the web.

Just completed my move to Eurosky, complete with custom domain handle, and the whole process was amazingly quick, painless, and with (as yet) no change BlueSky’s usability. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Would migrate again

@waldosgift.bsky.social yooo what happened???

Got told I was “unusual” by an absolutely massive man wearing dungarees in a pub bathroom after he saw me wash my hands prior to using the urinal. Context: I had just eaten a very greasy burger and wanted to clean my hands before touching my penis and yes, I washed them a second time afterwards.

I've seen this going around today and it's beautiful, so here's a gift link.

The cutscenes in MGS1 remake The Twin Snakes were originally far more faithful to the original. But after Kojima saw an early version he fed back that they should be punched up, leading to the Matrix-y bullet time cinematics in the final game

The single dumbest gadget I want to will into existence is an E-Ink Steam Deck so I can read visual novels in bed without blasting screen light at my eyes

fun fact: in Soviet Russia fish holds man in Hinge profile picture

why is being able to cook considered attractive when most cooking is just following simple instru… actually no wait I get it now

Seriously considering dressing up as Bioshock's dancing baguette boy this Halloween

Excited to have heard myself mentioned in the latest episode of @backpagepod.bsky.social, thus securing my place in the canon of UK video games journalism as “guy who was excited about the announcement of Metroid Prime 4 at E3 2017”