&y

I AM ISSUING A VERY STRONG EXECUTIVE ORDER THAT WE WILL ONLY USE ROMAN NUMERALS FROM NOW ON.

They’re fucking called ARABIC numerals.

I just think when some guy from YouTube ruins his own life by being a dipshit, I should get to continue not knowing who he is instead of hearing about him all the time!

If you post a job for a “principle engineer,” I wish you well, but I’m not interested in working for morons.

Once again, I am begging people not to COMPLETELY FUCK UP the DVDs they check out from the library.

If you think “woah” is a word, I am judging you and you are unworthy.

You people are only improving the songs you intend to ruin by adding “in my pants.”

Republican voters are such fucking rubes.

Smarmy waa.

when the anti-anxiety tube is definitely working

Everybody who knows anything about golf knows that the major championship “links style” courses routinely cut down all the trees as soon as they reach maturity. This is why there are no trees in Scotland.

The “presumption of regularity” should be abolished forever—not just for criminals like Blanche, but even for future AG Jack Smith. Equal justice is not compatible with giving the benefit of the doubt to either side unless they have earned it during the case in question.

Correct response by the Committee to Netanyahu nominating Trump. This is a wonderful, indefatigable worker against war.

Despite my opposition to puppy eating, I do eat puppies.

Everybody calm down. I’ve been to Irkutsk. They’re all very bright people and definitely nothing could ever get out of hand. They got this.

This is objectively psychotic and every member of Congress and Senate should be ashamed if they don’t try to remove him from office before this happens

Ooooh! Two MAGA morons overheard in the hall at work! MM1: I’m tired of my tax dollars going for these political ads. MM2: What are you talking about? MM1: Every other ad is about Trump pumping himself up. …and then they left my eavesdropping range.

It’s almost as if the slope was slippery.

Psychopath

Good morning team. Abolish the death penalty!

Have you no sense of dignity Senator, at long last?

Coach Beard seems to have done reasonably well in that Senate hearing today.

I saw a joke during the London Olympics. It was just Gollum saying “Mary Poppinses!” about the opening ceremony and it was hilarious and I think about it often, but my skill at searching the Internet isn’t what it used to be. Here’s hoping this fresh new hell revives the joke somewhere.

Classic live album: Boofin’ with Squi at the Devil’s Triangle

THANK YOU BAKU

“Maybe later” “Not now” Sorry website/phone app/etc., the answer is “fucking never.”

I see they’re sabotaging him this year by ensuring that the Teleprompter is working perfectly well.

I am so fucking embarrassed by this corrupt rapist & I am so sick of being so fucking embarrassed by him and his whole motherfucking regime.

Mr. Trump sir, diesel prices are so high I can no longer afford to roll coal at electric cars or bicycles.

I get what you're saying but I don't think Obama paperwork is the answer. Instead I expect the fight to be state by state with secy's of state refusing to put Trump on the Nov. ballot. Bolster them, against lawsuits (and arrests). Trump in the primaries might also scramble other GOP candidates.

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