your pal uly

i don’t know if i’ve watched a texas team in my lifetime with a larger delta in every game between screaming at the tv (complimentary) and screaming at the tv (derogatory)

this fucking team man

arch has resting concussion face so this one’s tough

just good clean football all around, not at all frustrating

"chat how do i make this loss more embarrassing"

if only we could convert the pure, focused, and nearly limitless spite of primaried texas republicans directly into electricity

just got a reminder from greg abbott to go vote tomorrow and you know what greg i think i will thanks

welllllllllllllllllllllllll shit

brother this texas offense fucking sucks

ignoring for a moment that this is some goofy ass setup, has anyone in the last decade gotten a spam text and earnestly wondered “how did they get my phone number”

oh eagles my goodness

maaaaaaan fuck that shit

THAT WAS HOT FUCKING GARBAGE

at last we will learn the true identity of one of the numerous matts brown

whoever is spending ken’s ad money is on an absolute heater right now

i am not a wnba knower but i must say that it’s really nice to see the timeline having a great time out there and also know that i don’t have to hear about anyone on the fucking fever for the rest of the year

so anyway yeah i haven’t come up with a worse one yet

not sure i’ve ever seen a more unlikable qb matchup than rodgers vs watson

"check out this nasty thing I found on X" no and you should go set a timer for 10 minutes and look at a tree until your phone beeps

by the time the lockout is over this will be a 95 win season in my mind

well then

ok just got of my last meeting time to take an enormous sip of water and see how things are going in the base ball contest

there's a common misconception that there's just one liberty biberty but it's actually a species and there are thousands of them. every time one misses a line they drown it in a bucket and put a new one in

well the king and sousa portions of the game are going very much as expected

Impressed at his lack of immediate reaction

my beloved team of nice boys has transformed into a bunch of crotch wafting hot dogs 😭

i still can't figure out why his team won't let him debate

i'd like to welcome everyone outside of texas who is just now learning about how tough on serious crime ken paxton is. for more information please search "ken paxton federal charges" or "ken paxton fbi"

Great defense, please keep saying that into a microphone, sir