The Daily Tism

I’ve decided that for every Pet Gala ticket sold from now on, I’m going to post a cat pic from my camera roll, current or historic.

Ok but truly my pet peve is SKELETON SPIDERS! SPIDERS DON'T HAVE BONE GDMIT!!!

One of my all-time favourite @sarahamero.bsky.social pieces is on Patreon right now, complete with epic photo choice by Sarah!

When you've received the cursed videotape from The Ring landed but it requires a minor admin task so let's face it, you're fucked. The Daily Tism News Halloween audio special is up wherever you get podcasts.

After listening to them talk about road signs for just two minutes, I *so* wish I'd seen their show at the Fringe.

I love Cerys! So excited for this!

By me, with funnier additions and expert editing by Sara G.

I knew I was in trouble when I brought this gremlin home, she trotted confidently out of her carrier, sat down and gave me this look like “try it, punk”. She says everyone should come to the Pet Gala because she breaks thumbs??? I’m just the translator.

An autistic man was left reeling this Halloween after being forced to confront numerous anatomical inaccuracies in an alleged “skeleton”, eyewitnesses have said.

It's nearly Halloween! That's GHOST CHRISTMAS! Time for a thread of My Silly Halloween Jokes As What I Done Wrote.

I wrote this trilogy about a family of ghost hunters, which is also about enduring love, and death, and socioeconomic neglect, and the small ways we can save the world.

An autistic man’s ADHD is threatening to take over and turn him evil, it has been rumoured.

Right, soldiers - let’s see if we can get this bad boy over the £10k mark before the end of October. Whether you’re a celebrity with silly money or someone with a spare fiver, every penny helps so much & you get exclusive show-related rewards www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/its-a-supe...

Never change, Macca. To (virtually) meet her, many other pet pals and pay to play to have us shower yours with praise, come along to our Pet Gala Crowdfunder event for It’s a Superpower?? in November: www.crowdfunder.co.uk/checkout/its...

Second confirmed Pet Gala attendee - McCartney, AKA Macca, simultaneously the smartest and stupidest cat I’ve ever lived with. Macca is a sentient ball of fluff.

Gavin Monks, 26, reportedly eschewed traditional Halloween fancy-dress options in favour of a costume he claimed would be “sure to strike fear and dread into the hearts of those around him”: a neurotypical man blissfully unbothered by even a trace of autism.

That was amazing. We all revealed a lot of truths about ourselves completely accidentally. I'm off to rewatch Dracula: Dead and Loving It while wearing jelly shoes.

The only thing to fear is fear itself. Totally kidding - it's parties. Listen to our Halloween audio sketch show special, The Daily Tism News, wherever you get podcasts.

Come along in just over an hour and watch me make a right cunt of myself in an episode that’ll probably be unpublishable. Sign up at any paid level to get the Zoom link.

Just clicked on my own profile, saw that I wasn’t following myself & had a moment of RSD panic wondering what I’d done to offend myself. This evening’s podcast recording is going to be a ride.

I just want everyone to know that I’ll be doing this recording high as a kite and in my Gremlins pyjamas. What could go wrong?

Come hear things I think are cute anecdotes that turn out to be childhood trauma

A so-called “witch” thought to be stalking the protagonists of a found-footage horror film is just an autistic woman who wants to show someone her découpage, it has been rumoured.

An autistic potter has only just realised that she has been conducting an intense love affair with a ghost for the last three months, and not just teaching him about creating earthenware, it has been announced.

The main thing I learned from listening to It's a Superpower?? by @thedailytism.com is that almost any phrase can be the name of my sex tape.

An autistic woman who cannot get to sleep is about to guarantee a totally sleepless night by applying her overactive imagination to the mundane sounds of her house, it has been reported.

They’re lemon sherbet cupcakes, they’re really very good and they’re going in the baking booklet. I am have managed diabetes and this lil piece of food comedy writing might actually kill me so please buy a copy.

A motorist has once again failed to pick up the ghost of AuDHD woman on the anniversary of her death, sources have revealed, as she completely forgot she was meant to turn up at all until two days later.

We’ve gone concept

Pippa Durham, 39, feels most at home in a long skirt and smart blouse with a big collar, which she thought was a nice moody take on officewear but has instead led to countless questions from strangers about who she’s playing in The Crucible.

An autistic man has issued a statement calling on the public not to kink shame him over his unusual choice of masturbatory material.

An autistic woman attempting to communicate with spirits via an Ouija board is becoming increasingly perturbed by their insistence on spelling out medical acronyms, sources have said.

Krista Shure, 32, has no idea what the actual film is about, but does know what her Tinder profile is about and it’s the same fucking story.

Sign up to our Patreon at any paid level to join us - and tell your coven too! www.patreon.com/TheDailyTism...

Join good witch Sara Gibbs, brooding vampire Sarah Amero and mischievous fey trickster Hare Lockwood as we gather around a bubbling cauldron for a live recording of the series finale on Sunday the 25th of October at 6pm UK time!

The misunderstanding occurred when Olivia Buckingham, 27, heard friend Becky Armitage, 30, describe herself as “such a Carrie”, prompting Buckingham to explain that she had never seen the movie.

Tomorrow!!!

Krista Shure, 32, has no idea what the actual film is about, but does know what her Tinder profile is about and it’s the same fucking story.

An autistic woman attempting to communicate with spirits via an Ouija board is becoming increasingly perturbed by their insistence on spelling out medical acronyms, sources have said.

An autistic man has issued a statement calling on the public not to kink shame him over his unusual choice of masturbatory material.

An autistic teenager who had a bucket of pigs’ blood dumped onto her at her high school prom has reportedly had far worse – even just today.

Pippa Durham, 39, feels most at home in a long skirt and smart blouse with a big collar, which she thought was a nice moody take on officewear but has instead led to countless questions from strangers about who she’s playing in The Crucible.