Jess Morrissette

Modern games: [invisible wall] Retro games: A six-point presentation on why you are unworthy of this shovel.

Today on Quest Quest the adventure game podcast, @decafjedi.com and I talk about "bad" adventure game design quirks we want back. Like, say, having your mostly unskilled office voice a big budget adventure game. Listen here or where ever: zencastr.com/z/05Jo2Zli

VGSM Project blast from the past: Kinky Cola from Rocky Interactive Horror Show!

This week on Quest Quest: @bvigeant.bsky.social and I discuss "bad" ideas from the history of adventure games that are overdue for a comeback. Will we make an impassioned plea to add more mazes to modern adventures? No, we will not. Listen here (or wherever): zencastr.com/z/05Jo2Zli

I want to 3D print a tiny phone for Link's hand so it looks like he's taking a selfie.

It's time for more Undead Week at the Video Game Soda Machine Project! This Beepis vending machine appears in Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines 2. In my opinion, it's a real step down from the original game's Liquid DemonSeed.

Next up for Undead Week at the Video Game Soda Machine Project... Somebody stuffed a decapitated zombie head into this ZAFizz vending machine from Zombie Army 4: Dead War.

With Halloween right around the corner, the Video Game Soda Machine Project is celebrating Undead Week! First up is this Cali Cola vending machine from Dead Island 2. I took the screenshot while my character was holding a bloody katana and standing on a pool table. As one does.

A/C repair tech at our house: “Sooo, what’s with all of the Monkey Island stuff?” Boy, was he surprised.

Six students booked advising appointments with me today. One showed up. I had fun sitting in my office all day, though.

A normal Wolverine.

Next up for Undead Week at the Video Game Soda Machine Project... Somebody stuffed a decapitated zombie head into this ZAFizz vending machine from Zombie Army 4: Dead War.

Zuckerberg is basically Bizarro Jeremy Bentham. Both wanted to exert influence from beyond the grave, but only one cared about the greatest good for the greatest number.

Years Of Learning To Love Self Undone By Single Glimpse Of Body In Self-Checkout Camera https://theonion.com/years-of-learning-to-love-self-undone-by-single-glimpse-of-body-in-self-checkout-camera/

With Halloween right around the corner, the Video Game Soda Machine Project is celebrating Undead Week! First up is this Cali Cola vending machine from Dead Island 2. I took the screenshot while my character was holding a bloody katana and standing on a pool table. As one does.

I just updated my soda machine site's PHP version, and I don't think it broke anything. 😅

The older I get, the weepier I get at Ellen Greene's performance of "Suddenly Seymour." There's a look she gives Moranis while he's singing the first verse that is so real, so honest, and cuts through how cartoonish the film is, and it just destroys me.

The Batman (2022) is too much movie. It needs to be 40% less movie.

People forget that back in the 90s, kids weren't on the computer all the time, they didn't have cell phones. Instead they watched the Beethoven dog movies

I get why so many boomers are aghast at the idea of younger generations going "no contact" with their parents. It must be upsetting to be faced with the reality that you fucked up the most important (and easiest) part of being a parent: loving your child unconditionally.

Perfect as always.

@decafjedi.com Here is my submission for the Video Game Soda Machine Project. The screenshot is from Crow Country.

It's kind of a bummer when the local high school is the only thing of significance within a 30 minute walk in any direction.

Greek yogurt is a really healthy snack if you don't care how things taste.

New at the Video Game Soda Machine Project... Helldivers 2 features these Taste of Democracy and Taste of Freedom soda machines scattered around its human settlements. They dispense Dr. Democracy, Mr. Taste, Prof. Delicious, and Yummm, Esq.

New at the Video Game Soda Machine Project... Helldivers 2 features these Taste of Democracy and Taste of Freedom soda machines scattered around its human settlements. They dispense Dr. Democracy, Mr. Taste, Prof. Delicious, and Yummm, Esq.

Greek yogurt is a really healthy snack if you don't care how things taste.

Some video game publishers are always trying to ice skate uphill.

Proposition 1: The Mass Effect series is cancelled. Proposition 2: MaleShep is the canonical version of Commander Shepard. Corollary: FemShep remains uncancelled. In this essay, I will...

I need to quit letting students schedule appointments with me after 4:00 p.m. They never show up, and I end up getting stuck in rush hour traffic on my commute home. 😡

I still remember the moment where my male Hawke and Fenris got together in my Dragon Age 2 playthrough. I had never, ever seen two men kiss in a video game and it not be treated as a joke.

Proposition 1: The Mass Effect series is cancelled. Proposition 2: MaleShep is the canonical version of Commander Shepard. Corollary: FemShep remains uncancelled. In this essay, I will...

I started strength-training with resistance bands today, so prepare yourself for an upcoming post about me breaking my face thanks to the miracle of elasticity.

New at the Video Game Soda Machine Project: this Spike Energy vending machine from Valorant!

New at the Video Game Soda Machine Project: this Spike Energy vending machine from Valorant!

Maximum 1998 video game ad aesthetic. I can't emphasize strongly enough that this is a clean scan. The ad looks that way on purpose.

Seriously, how amazing is this 1984 print ad for a BASIC tutorial software package? "Street talk of the future."