bird 🐤

my pronouns are whatever is funnier for the bit

why does the ER not have a valet service

im watching your pot so it never boils fuck you

batman looks retroactively less insane now that in the dc timeline superheroes existed long before bruce was born and he probably lived through some heroes operating in gotham

watching all my friends get engaged meanwhile the only thing im ENGAGED WITH is BATMAN and his GAY SONS

is it normal for your loved ones to argue about who gets your bones when you die

archaeologists reconstructed this woman's larynx and were BAFFLED to find she had clocky tgirl voice

(fozzie bear voice) I Like Big Butts And I Cannot Lie

im predicting i'll get really into puppetry when i get there

does anyone else hold their shopping cart like you're driving a horse drawn carriage

was reading rebirth nightwing and having a good time reading my action slop until i remembered they turn him into ric grayson and he's genuinely useless for like 30 issues

i feel like the easiest way for me to explain pathological demand avoidance to someone is by saying "im not allowed" instead of just refusing to do something

times like these make me wish a got an art history degree. no doubt one of the most useful degrees in life

[guy who's only seen marvel movies] duuude when is da vinci gonna make a sequel to the last supper

alien redneck with a broken down space ship in their front yard

why dont games based on comic characters do the cel shading style more often. like the only two games i can even think of are the telltale batman/walking dead games and that one hellboy game and they both LOOK pretty good ignoring the gameplay

i am legit too dumb for blue prince bro every time i look at my notes im just thinking about this image

saw my kitchen manager smoking a joint outside. went inside just to see our bar manager taking shots before his shift starts. am i the only sober person left alive

im gonna be so pissed when archaeologists unearth my masturbatorium and think it's just some lowly gathering room

sometimes i wonder how many problems in my life i could solve by becoming extremely religious

the amount of times people have assumed im ftm when they first meet me is so funny

there's no way a crunch wrap supreme doesn't have a little bit of crack in it

finally finished new 52 batman, now to move onto rebirth with tom king (gross)