weird medieval guys

I'VE HAD TO KEEP THIS QUIET FOR SO LONG BUT NOW THE CAT CAN FINALLY ESCAPE THE BAG I wrote another book!! and it's coming out this November! it's a little like a birdwatching guide, except it's a word watching guide! i poured my heart into it!! you can even pre-order it now!! link in biooo ahhh

just read about a medieval guy amassing an army of ‘50 thousand clowns’ by ‘beguiling them with his juggling’ and got so excited before i realised clown used to mean ‘farm worker’ and juggling used to mean ‘general trickery’

t shirt concept (is this too niche?)

Dropping in on the Discourse to reiterate that British food is a) not bad and b) the way Americans specifically talk about it is completely deranged. Yes Brits eat more processed food than anywhere else in Western Europe and that is Not Good but it’s also doubly true of America!

little demon, france, 15th century

fossil hunting is a cool hobby because it will take you to some truly beautiful spots but also to some places where a wise man wouldn’t go with a gun

switched pharmacies and went into the new one for the first time to check if they had my meds. the guy looked in the back and said “yeah, we’ve got them….catch!” and pretended to baseball pitch them directly at my noggin

a 13th-14th century seal depicting a squirrel encircled by the words I CRAKE NOTIS ('i crack nuts')

it’s crazy that shakira cribbed that world cup song from a 1986 song about serving in the corrupt cameroonian military youtu.be/expCgeQXqzA?...

playing a little tune

they don’t want you to know this but the 10 million year old fossilised shark teeth at the beach are free, you can just go take them

I saw satan fall like lightning from heaven 🤣

A pneumatic goblet designed by Ismail al-Jazari in the 13th century. When the goblet is filled with wine, the duck on top begins to scream and rotate before stopping with its beak pointed at a random partygoer. It doesn't stop screaming until the chosen person has drained the goblet completely.

“not to point fingers but-“

crazy how many unlabelled elephant leather boots you can buy on ebay

jesus christ i could eat a theoretically infinite number of pierogi

thinking about this 1500 year old plush swan made of reindeer wool

close friends, france, 15th century

SEE WHAT I MEAN??

virgin mary punching the devil, england, 13th century

i‘m making this medieval hood and i bought this lovely deadstock tom ford woollen houndstooth fabric and consequently it feels tremendously boujie

last year i invented the ‘emergency breakfast’. it’s a packet of scampi fries and an ice cream sandwich from the corner shop and as best i can tell it’s nutritionally complete

COVER REVEAL!! LOOK AT THE AMERICAN COVER FOR MY BOOK!!! she’s soooo beautiful!! don’t you want her? pre-order her now so you can have her asap! out november 10! sites.prh.com/wordspotters...

HUGE NEWS!!! we are doing the first EVER weird medieval guys live event and it's a (medieval) pub quiz in london!!! gonna be so much fun and i will be THROWING free stickers at everyone present so grab a ticket and come on down!!!! www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/weird-medi...

eatin spaghetti, germany, 15th century

fell to my knees in the sunlit orangerie of the london fan museum

hey i need to pop out for a sec can you keep an eye on him for me thanks

thinking about the medieval cat door in Exeter cathedral again

spring/summer hot fashion tip: i heard that zoomorphic fibulae are expected to make a BIG comeback!