Maddi

I honestly needed yesterday. Just a day to dress up for a while. Be silly. Dance. It was relieving.

Everyday I give up just a little more. And everyday im happier. Giving up and leaving.

Literally like $10,000 would solve about 60% of my problems.

Just qhen im used to something I get upended and change my lifestyle. This time is a little sad though.

I genuinely wish I didnt have to talk to so many people. But I also truly believe in community, especially now. We need to protect each other and help each other.

I dont adjust to change well. Especially not when it's thrust upon me without warning or consent in this manner. Im still adjusting.

I need a place to go Sunday to Monday with my dogs if strangers that talk shit behind my back are gonna keep being in my house. I dont wanna cause issues with my room mate.

Being the adult in a situation is not my strong suit. Especially when it has to do with someone speaking about my business who's never said more than 2 words to me at any point. Im the type to confront things head on and apparently thats frowned upon.

Thizz face made it to the Olympics and as always idc what people say im proud of my lil city and proud of the bay.

Im an official auntie. Not like my friends kids. My little sisters kid was born. My older sister next. Bout to love and adore them so much.

Just putting it out there if for some reason im taken out like that if someone says "she wouldn't have wanted this" about civil unrest. Yes I would. I approve.

Sincerely thr rage that I have built up the last two days could fill a football stadium. I fear for the next person who says or does some dumb shit.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but cops are not allowed to shoot people just because you didn't do what they said. That is called murder when they do that. Some cops are working hard to convince people otherwise.

As a lifelong hockey and lifelong sharks fan. Dont fuck with the youngest on the team. Sharks having a great season and im so happy to see many new hockey fans coming up. Enjoy. Its my favorite sport.

Im gonna be going a little insane over the next couple weeks. So pardon me while I crashout a bit. Im overstimulated by existing right now. Everything is too much and to be honest Im planning on making it someone else's problem right now.

Rewarching stranger things all together to see how i feel about thr finale after. If it's different. I cannot stress how much every prior season is so good.

New years resolutions can suck it. Im just gonna keep doing what I was doing and exist better

Interpersonal relationships are too difficult to maintain. But I've got people i need to make sure they're okay also so I cant just disappear into the woods. Existence is complicated.

I love to be outside. Love it. I enjoy relaxing and watching TV and video games but there's something special about walking around a lake

I made this! *with dough my cousin made. But he taught me and now im gonna make my own! Im a sourdough girlie now.

Really antsy today. Coming up on my cousins bday and it always makes my anxiety go wild. Not to mention holidays. Dog maybe needing surgery. Bills. I need to clean my entire house. I need to run to the top of a hill and scream. I need to curl into a ball and cry since I didnt get any sleep.

Straight up struggling in this economy. Mentally and financially. And now my dog has a new lump and im panicking. I really cant handle that hit right now. Going to the vet hoping its not something serious.

Occasionally I dress up and have a face.

He fell asleep like this. Lmaooo. For like a couple minutes. He woke up when I got up.

Me to my dad: we will see how i feel later. Im dying you know. [A joke] Him: okay well die quietly. 🤣

Therapy is great. I say it all the time. I need it. Lots of others should do it. I dont care how obnoxious it seems to talk about, im gonna keep doing it. Break the stigma.

It's crazy how people can be far away and not an active part of yojr life for extended periods. But that's practically your family. Their kids know you as family and you see them and its like no time has passed. I literally have known them my entire life.

I have a borderline unhealthy obsession with pesto. Its becoming a problem. Send help. Maybe.

I have spent too much time socializing and my anxiety is at a record high. My tolerance has been better recently, but I did two days of heavy socializing and in one instance was hit on which drains me a lot. So I think im done for at least 4-10 days. Lol. No big events. Only my people I can handle.

Dressing up for tonight to go to a casual dinner with my friend because I wanna feel cute. And dressing out of my comfort zone cause I feel confident today.

Hawaiian food just hits.

Low effort corporation Halloween.

Being allergic to over the counter pain meds is one of the trials of life I guess. Acetaminophen gives me a rash. Excedrin gives me hives. Ibuprofen makes me ill but its the least offensive but if I take over 200mg I get pretty debilitating sick. And yet my migraine dont give a fuck.

We gotta look out for each other. The government doesnt care about us. The police dont care about us. I feel safe going alone to certain shows alone because they know this. Shoutout to the pit and the guys that walked me to my car after the show. 🥰

Sleep? What's that who's she?

I wanna go and watch them again.

Nothing is better than the vibes of a band that clearly loves what they do, make good music, and are about the culture of their music. I wont get over seeing them live. I wanna see them again.

Post concert depression. I miss the pit. I miss the vibes. Especially from the punk group we saw. Ive had some bad metal experiences, rare but it happens, but punk is my first love. I was on a natural high after that show and im addicted.

Im not ready to burn the bridge, but I know i am not going to let hating you consume me. One of the most dangerous things you can be to me is someone I dont care about. One way or another. I genuinely now do feel like I just dont care and its freed me.

Sweethearts an excellent movie. Firstly Caleb Hearon is everything. Second that two main characters, perfect. No notes.

To many people makeup changes their face and makes them feel confident. For me. Its my earnings. I always had an earing for thr occasion. When my peircings closed a few years ago I was too depressed to even fix it. Now I have and getting back to wearing them. Matching to my outfit. Its nice

My town is truly unmatched. Walking my dog this morning, see a 22 revolver in the middle of the road. Juat chilling there.

Unintentionally being forced to always be the positive happy person; and then when you break you cant show it. Cause people feed off your energy too much and it will affect them. Its almost like a Superpower.

Im infuriated. I dont like what's happening and im tired of being called violent and aggressive because I wont let someone break down a door and tear apart a family. Fuck off.

My hot take: the new Cracker Barrel logo isn't great. the old one sucked. their food isn't great. also, who gives a shit?