Roi Fainéant Press SUBS ARE OPEN, BAYBEE!

*ahem* 1,911 posts. 1,342 writers. 5 years. Issue #100 live now. Give your grandma her lucky number before she heads to the bingo hall, yes? www.roifaineantpress.com/blog #WritingCommunity

What's this? A bit of CNF to brighten your day! It's not like we can depend on the sunshine to do that this time of year in our little part of the world. This is "the traces of us" by Andrea Damic @damicandrea.bsky.social You can read all of it on Saturday in our 101st issue.

This tiny bite is the beginning of what turns out to be a difficult conversation. It's also the beginning of "Remembering Polly", a sad but sweet little story from Mark Ifanson. You can find the entire story in our 101st issue this Saturday, 10/31!

We're wrapping up our rewind of issue 100 with a little tale that is half coming-of-age story, half nature documentary, and half thriller. Yes, I know that doesn't add up. Just go check it out. This is "Big Bald Bear" by Devin James Leonard. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/big-bal...

I don't know what kind of scarecrow hangs out with a crow at a writers' workshop and then hooks up with them. But I do know I'm ready to find out more! This is "Good Morning!" by Mark Ifanson and it's live now in our 100th issue! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/good-mo...

I don't think I've ever watched an entire episode of Xena. After reading @sadeebee.bsky.social 's essay, "Who wouldn’t want a badass woman with a sword?", I am going to have to rectify that! Check it out and answer the question for yourself! Live now 👇 www.roifaineantpress.com/post/who-wou...

What would you do if you knew the exact moment of the foretold Rapture? And would your behavior in your last days on this earth change your eternal outcome? Thoughts to ponder as you read "Out of Office" by @andrewcareaga.bsky.social in issue 100. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/out-of-...

Meet Birdie. I love this girl as much as I love this introduction. She is one of the 2 characters you'll meet in "The Damn Train" by @keithroysdon.bsky.social You can find her down by the tracks in our 100th issue. See if you don't love her as much as I do! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/the-dam...

I can't say we've all been there. But I can say I have. Hungover, that is. If you too are one of those foolish souls who have overindulged at times, have I got a poem for you! This is "Cities, surrounded by friends" by DS Maolalai & you can find it here!👇 www.roifaineantpress.com/post/blonde-...

Sometimes in life, you're riding the gravy train. Other times, things go totally off the rails. But let's not get sidetracked. Sorry, I'll stop with the train sayings. "The Damn Train" by @keithroysdon.bsky.social is a train story that really isn't about trains at all. Out Sunday!

"Who wouldn’t want a badass woman with a sword?" That is an excellent question and also the title of an excellent essay by @sadeebee.bsky.social Check it out in issue 100, coming at you on Sunday! They might just convince you to make Xena your next rewatch!

Whenever I receive an out-of-office reply to an email, I'm usually a little jealous of the person who is away from their job. I think I'd be a bit more than jealous if this reply bounced back to my inbox. This is "Out of Office" by @andrewcareaga.bsky.social & you can check it out on 9/27!

I love when a poem tells you exactly what it is. And then proceeds to be anything but that. Check out "Blonde bleach hair", one of two by DS Maolalai that you can read in issue 100, Sunday. I think you'll find more than a description of a sunset.

How do you celebrate the 100th issue of the pressiesst press to ever have pressed? The way we celebrate everything! With a POETRY PARTY!! Find "The Approximate Distance Between" by Mark LaMonda, Sunday 9/27!

Have you ever read the opening lines of a story and wondered if you missed something? Like an entire chapter? Now imagine you're the narrator in that story, how you'd feel! Check out "Good Morning!" by Mark Ifanson and find out! Sunday!

Some people do everything they can to resist change. Some jump in headfirst. Others make sure the time is just right. This is "Maybe It’s Time for a Change" by Mark Ifanson, the story of a woman considering making a very big change in her life. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/maybe-i...

YO. If you see this lady out in the wild today, make sure to wish her a very happy birthday! HBD @kelkel.bsky.social ! We love you!

When filmmaker Tommy Wiseau ends up as the guest of honor at a billionaire’s retreat, it's perfectly normal to wonder why. I mean, have you seen "The Room"? Even Tommy is wondering. Check out "Oh, Hi Mark (Zuckerberg)" by Keith Vile to find the answer. 👇 www.roifaineantpress.com/post/oh-hi-m...

Here's a bite from a story that may be a bit spicy for a Thursday afternoon. "Vision of the Hare Goddess" by Sean Flood tells the tale of a young woman's attendance at bacchanalian gatherings & her visions that followed. And it's live right here, right now! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/visions...

Turn up the volume and get ready for the Poetry Party! This one comes with its own soundtrack! Enjoy this little taste of "Tonight We Listened to Big Thief’s Vegas" by Ben Glaser. And then go find the rest of this gorgeousness in issue 99! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/tonight...

The idea of parallel universes really appeals to me. But I've never thought about what could happen if different timelines crossed or got entangled. "A Day at the Circus" by Gregory Smith might be a result of one such entanglement! Check it out!👇 www.roifaineantpress.com/post/a-day-a...

I was reminded today that Skynet became self-aware on 8/29. Granted, it happened in a fictitious version of 1997. But I still like the timing of this story being in our August issue! This is "Clive" by Ron Arbuckle, and it's live now! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/clive-b...

Billionaires suck. Data centers suck. AI everywhere you turn sucks. You know what doesn't suck? Reading a story written by a human being about a human being! Thank goodness we still have that luxury! This is "Clive", a story by Ron Arbuckle. Live on Sunday!

Who needs a little poetry party to get them through the rest of this week? It can't hurt, right? Not when we have this little beauty on tap! This is "Tonight We Listened to Big Thief's Vegas" by Ben Glaser. Look for it on Sunday!

A world that allows billionaires can feel broken to those of us who don't have that obscene lust for such ridiculous wealth. And it is absolutely ridiculous. Sometimes all we can do is point out how ridiculous. This is "Oh, Hi Mark (Zuckerberg)" by Keith Vile. Look for it 8/31.

When a story's opening line contains the word "debauchery", it really grabs your attention. Don't you think? Well, you're going to have to wait until Sunday for the rest of the story! So come back on 8/30 to find "Visions of the Hare Goddess" by Sean Flood!

Coming soon to the internet near you, the 99th edition of RF! In the digital pages of that issue, you'll find the rest of this delightful mash-up of history and parallel universes! For now, this taste of "A Day at the Circus" by Gregory Smith will have to suffice.

I used to call my brother a ‘dolt’ when we were little and I would kidnap his beloved stuffed animals. The complications of sibling dynamics and the love that exist in spite of them. Read “The Knotty Days” by Kelly Murashige in our 98th edition. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/the-kno...

This creative non-fiction piece is one we can all relate to, I think. The blistering burn of self criticism, trauma, and abuse and the trying like hell to undo what has been done..Read “Spine of Wrath” by Lynne Lerma. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/spine-o...

Embarrassed by casual racism from a colleague directed at an old enemy, our protagonist faces a conundrum. Presenting “At the Food Court” by Tom Ray. These days the racism is a black tie event with a sit down dinner. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/at-the-...

A timely piece awaits you in the 98th edition. “A Holiday Shopping Odyssey” by @johntures1.bsky.social is a spoof of Odysseus’ journey -with a shopping trip gone awry! Read it here! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/a-holid...

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose. Sometimes you can’t even pick your friends, they just happen. “Just Friends” by @stephenlanderson.bsky.social is in the 98th edition! here! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/just-fr...

Some poems are mantras, I have been reading this poem all day as needed. “new moon rules” by @ellecantwell.bsky.social may even sing me to sleep tonight. Read it in the 98th edition. Here. 👇 www.roifaineantpress.com/post/anthem-...

Ready for a ribald poem to set the party in motion? Well put your keys in the basket and let’s read “Septuagenarian Swing Set” by @tomljanovic.bsky.social. It’s in our 98th edition. Check over your shoulder and click this link! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/septuag...

“The Reflectionist” by @kiptain.bsky.social is a beautiful flash piece from the 98th edition. A fable, a tale, or an alternative reality, see yourself in it. Read it here. www.roifaineantpress.com/post/the-ref...

Welcome to this last week of July and the poetry party that begins our 98th edition! "come along fellow wizards" by @osageorange.bsky.social is out running wild in the world now, and you can read it here! www.roifaineantpress.com/post/come-al...

Today’s poetry jam features the anaphoric poem, “come along fellow wizards” by J. R. Wilkerson @osageorange.bsky.social inspired by a tour on The Potter Trail in Edinburgh. It’s lovely, it’s nostalgic, it’s joyful and you can read it on Sunday 7/26.

‘Cringe’ is super in today, but sometimes that cringe is just something really wrong that’s met with a shrug instead of a punch in the face. “At the Food Court” by Tom Ray is in the next edition of the press out 7/26.

Some research suggests that the relationship between siblings shapes us just as much if not more than parental ones. “The Knotty Days” by Kelly Murashige is a touching look at brother/sister vibes and the love and conflict in a constant dance. Read this on 7/26. Sunday!

Fun, sexy, silly, wild, and seventy. Read the micro-fiction/humor piece “Septuagenarian Swing Set” by @tomljanovic.bsky.social in our next edition out on 7/26 and remember, you only live once.