A Regular Dad

My Super Bowl Prediction I Forgot to Upload The Other Day

My New App Will Save Time (And Peoples’ Lives)

Magikarp Taught Me Unconditional Love

Is Amnesia Contagious?

Technological Solipsism

How to Handle Identity Theft and False Criminal Records

A Message to My Grandchildren

Celebrity and Politician Worship

Philosophy in Business

Weird Astrological Sign

Did I discover a new Mandela Effect?

What happens if you put all of the American Presidents on stage together? #politics #history

Disclosing government secrets I found on an old floppy disk #ufo #conspiracy *song used for reach*

Give Me Your Opinion #politics

Not to get political, but

The Three Keys to Happiness

How many of these infographic style Youtube videos do I have to watch until I’m a genius

If I see a UFO crash I will call AAA for them because I am nice

More like Russet Potato Sack Wilson

Not even trying to be funny: Applebees and Chili’s promoting those $9.99 and $10.99 sandwich meal deals to stick it to the overcharging fast food restaurants is brilliant

Why do local car commercial employees always look like they’re being held hostage

“The streets are gonna love this one” I say as a grown man with a mortgage and family about to make a Tik Tok

My wife is tired of hearing me DRONE on about UAPs and NHIs

I refuse to dabble in cryptocurrency because I still don’t even understand actual currency

I would commit insider trading but that involves networking with other humans

Orcas are seizing the means of crustacean

Seahawks uniforms look like glitching weather maps tonight

Drake Maye looks like the kid who took Call of Duty very seriously and shouted commands to his friends

Same

I have spent time on X and time on Bluesky and determined that both sides of the aisle have an equal number of furries

Me when my buddy wins the Nobel Prize

This is the longest I’ve endured watching the Panthers before switching to Red Zone in a while

My wife makes artisan microplastics

I hope we get one in 2025

I put the bro in “ugly unibrow”

Oh my god I hate regular clocks, cut the bull pucky and just show me the freakin numbers

Happy Holidays to those who will not be entering the kingdom of heaven

The first thing my daughter says when she wakes up every morning is “Hot Dog!” and I can’t tell if she wants the food or is expressing herself like a 1950’s sitcom character

Happy Saturday to those who celebrate

Is Polio Ralph Lauren trendy again or something

Still wish I knew Santa was real before I maxed out the dang Amex

Ran out of bread to feed the geese at the park so I started tossing them my Zyn pods

True southern emo kids flipped through the book of Revelation while the preacher spoke

When I catch Santa Claus in my house

Chili’s Honey Chipotle Chicken Crispers are so good I’m going to start bringing opiate test strips

If you played Halo 3 online heed my message

Let’s go Bulldogs, Jackson isn’t even a real state

Calling yourself “a momentum guy” is a subtle way of telling your employer that you have Bipolar Disorder

“Saturdays are for the boys”