Ralph D. Apel

I’ve been living in apartments since I was 17 and it makes me incredibly sad.

I don’t want to look up who Shane Gillis is

Chic-fil-a has some A.I. ass songs in their commercials

I’m voting to keep ICE out of girls volleyball

Buffy and Gilmore Girls are in rotation at my house. I don’t like how all the characters use the exact same witty dialogue and have the same senses of humor. Every character speaks in pop culture references

I saw Hocus Pocus in the theater and still don’t care for it.

I did a last minute film shoot for somebody who travels the world. They didn’t give me a dime.

I get it. A lot of people know I like Green Lantern and a popular Lanterns show just came out and so they reach out to me. But my life is more than just GL and I wish they’d think about me at other times.

When people use the term “sportsball”, my first thought is that they have zero originality.

My butt is in good shape, according to the shit I mailed to a bunch of weirdos.

Am I the only person that thinks Infinity War is better than End Game?

Saturday night and playing Mario Kart World. My wife is out of the house, so you know I’m playing as Swimwear Daisy!

Instagram stories are just carousels of basic bitch shit

You have no idea how much I’m struggling. This isn’t just internet hyperbole.

I find that people who go on and on, non-stop about practical effects bore me.

Goated is a dumb word

I bet a lot of people think I’m a happy person

People out there still shooting Boomerangs of clinking glasses

Can someone pick up my eyes? They rolled across the room.

Do Trump next

This movie is really close to being in my Letterboxd Top 4

The End of Oak Street might be my favorite movie of the year. Seriously.

More like D69

I changed my name

On Monday we were told our cat is about to die. Today I was told that my car was dead and it’ll be $7K to fix it. It’s a really good time to leave me the fuck alone.

Lanternslive.com

Old people: Kids these days, always on their phones and playing video games! Why don’t they just go outside and play. Also old people: I hate these kids outside on their e-bikes.

It’s hasn’t been a very good few weeks. Today was the worst of it and it sounds like it’s gonna get even worse any day now.

Lack of support fuels my imposter syndrome.

It’s happening

I did not like the wheat buns we got.

How come nobody on IG posts an inspiration Bible verse accompanying that footage of a man carrying a headless child through the rubble of Gaza? Is that not the god you serve?

Every sitcom dad in the 80s bought a fancy sports car because of a midlife crisis. I’m past midlife and I just wish I had enough money to get my Scion XB to run.

I seriously have zero time for bullshit

Baja Blast + Livewire =

My closet picks

The success of Obsession and Backrooms just shows that consumers would rather support small businesses.

_________________ just died. Good, I'm glad he's dead. He can no longer hurt innocent people!

I miss Pepsi Nitro

Cemeteries are dumb