M. David Ruff

I wish the average voter cared as much about democracy as my homeowners association cares about the shade of blue I’d like to paint my house door.

al-Khwarizmi essentially established the field of algebra in the 9th century while your ancestors were being raided by Vikings. But whatever.

Wait. You mean you don’t have to reelect a proto-fascist regime that attempted a coup after a brief democratic interregnum? I’m confused.

A little too on the nose.

I’m all for an egalitarian workplace, but when the pilot of a transatlantic flight is handing out snacks to the passengers, things have perhaps been taken too far.

Hopefully she will now have time to properly study for the bar exam.

Anyone who claims to be an attorney after failing the bar exam is a presumptive psychopath.

Black sand dunes? Sure. Why not. 🇮🇸

Out of office.

Luke and I made our mandatory pilgrimage to Reykjavik’s monument honoring the world’s unknown bureaucrats. Seemed fitting somehow.

Amsterdam was grand. Next stop Reykjavik.

Not loving the trend of every purchase and experience immediately being followed by a request to take a five minute satisfaction survey.

This thing in European hotels where you have to insert your room card into a slot to turn on the electricity is enough to turn me into Milton Friedman.

I get the money advantage, but probably not a great sign for the GOP to be pulling out of North Carolina and trying to shore up Kansas. It’d be like Dems in a general election writing off Pennsylvania and trying to save Oregon.

Let me guess. You then responded by sharing a poem you had written in his honor in fluent Mandarin.

After watching Eric Schmitt’s performance today, I would like to formally apologize to Tommy Tuberville. I was terribly wrong to consider you the dumbest member of the Senate.

Disagree. He probably gave away Taiwan for this.

The story about a D.C. woman studying witchcraft and using AI to help her craft blessings might be the most NPR thing I’ve ever heard.

I get the whole 21st century technicality, but any TV show ranking without the Sopranos as No 1 really isn’t worth reading.

Everyone said, “Don’t let him exhaust you. It’s what he wants.” But if I’m honest, I’m so exhausted.

I’m only a lawyer but even I learned in introductory psych that this experiment was the poster child for unethical human experiments. So, cool, cool.

So, the Supreme Court did the right thing? What’s the catch? A footnote declaring this will be our last election?

OK Compter really is the perfect album.

I don’t actually think he catnapped through the 9/11 memorial because his health is failing. I think he’s profoundly bored by any event not centered on himself.

Ok. This made me laugh. So true.

Apple’s new phone will fold - and doesn’t even require a call from Trump first.

The idea that he just doesn’t remember 9/11 is nonsense. It was 25 years ago, and I remember who I was with, where, and what we were doing. I even remember what I ate for lunch. Some days are burned in your memory forever and that was one.

Fighting with Canada and coddling some of the worst dictators on earth. American foreign policy in 2026.

I’m a reasonably well-informed individual. That said, I don’t think anyone should be expected to remember the name of the current British prime minister at this point.

I didn’t think it was possible for his hair to get worse. But here we are.

Pro tip: don’t wear a brightly colored Hawaiian shirt while shopping at Trader Joe’s. Unless you want other customers to ask you where the coconut oil is.

So, when he inevitably renames DC Trumplandia, how long before Google and Apple go along with it? 24 hours?

The main offense here is just how ugly this watch is.

Apparently my television now requires me to agree to an end user license agreement. Cool.

Eyes always on the prize

What a great artist and even greater human being. Rest in peace Dolly. Going to be listening to Little Sparrow a lot today.

Too many countries have played the role of obsequious toady when threatened with US tariffs (looking at you Switzerland). But not Canada. They are standing up to the bully. And I wish our neighbors to the north every success. Finally a demonstration of self-respect.

I have no earthly clue what this newest trading war is about. But I’d bet my life savings that we are in the wrong. Which is basically a safe call as an American in 2026.

Just watched the latest documentary about Boeing on Netflix. What an infuriating indictment of corporate greed, negligence, and regulatory capture. Say your prayers before going on one of their planes.

Just logged onto X, and it was absolutely vile. I’ll take the boredom and lack of engagement of this place any day.

Yeah. Don’t really need to read this. The answer is corruption, insanity, or stupidity. Those are the only options on his magic 8 ball. 🎱

A little yacht rock to wrap up the weekend.

I’m now coaching the Swiss national soccer team.

Late summer in a vase.

The press will largely “both sides” stuff for ten years. But if you use them as a literal threat decoy, they’re gonna get annoyed.

You know the California housing market is out of whack when a $1 million listing’s main asset is “chrome knobs”. #zillow

Based on my scientifically valid observations while driving around this weekend, Tesla drivers are the absolute worst drivers on earth.

Always a good day when a random person at the golf course compliments your hair.

I will also be recovering from home for an undisclosed number of weeks at full pay with no explanation. Said no American employee outside of the Senate ever.