Jack Kessler

The problem with Kane is he isn't easily categorised. Haaland is the archetypal goalscorer, Yamal the genius creator. Kane does both and, as of last week, also takes goal kicks.

TL;DR the more disparate and varied the value someone creates, the harder it can be to recognise and reward.

There's a reason you're handed a wine list without asking, but the dessert menu is always preceded by a question.

Less tarte Tatin, more avocado mousse. The restaurant dessert situation has developed not necessarily to the diner’s advantage.

Not here to yuck anyone’s yum but gave up on Project Hail Mary because it’s bad writing. I keep wanting to like science fiction but maybe I just like… science and fiction?

Similar to my relationship with hot chocolate, whereby every time I have one I realise how much more I’d prefer actual chocolate with a cup of tea.

Me: 1998 wasn't *that* long ago 1998:

Even more chilling with moving pictures.

Don’t consider it a sliding doors moment for my childhood because even Highgate boys weren’t watching in primary school but Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David’s *almost* decision to call Kramer ‘Kessler’ would’ve royally fucked up my SEO as an adult.

Incidentally my only other colleague on the Standard’s comment desk was a UCS boy so I used to observe that between us we ran the gamut of human experience.

Whenever I want to call family/friends in New York but don’t want to wake them I have to Google “New Jersey time” otherwise you get the newspaper and I can’t be the only one who does this.

When to speak up? Hint: while there’s still time to do something about it. A reflection on sad hotel rooms, congealing hollandaise sauce and why Bruno Fernandes picked the worst possible moment to give feedback.

You *could* send a complaint email when you get home. You might even receive a voucher. But your holiday is still ruined!

One benefit of repeatedly forgetting that John Silkin stood in the 1981 Labour deputy leadership election is that I get to experience the revelation anew every time.

A sort of 50 First Dates, but every date is 27 September 1981 and every location the Brighton Centre.

There are 1,500 (fifteen hundred) Boeing 737 MAX 10 aircraft on order so probably a good thing it *finally* got FAA certification to, you know, fly.

Subheads include but are not limited to:

Not an especially jumpy person but increasingly find the automatic kettle shut-off switch thing going *click* mid-pour extremely stressful.

*mechanism that does absolutely nothing for ages abruptly moves while you’re mid-task*

Worth noting that Musk means "the Jews".

I'd say it's a dog whistle but (((puppet masters pulling the strings in Congress))) is not exactly gunning for subtlety.

"UK economy in unexpected expansion" "Surprise GDP growth in Britain" "Island off Europe where locals cavort happily in swamps less crap than first thought"

If I were Andy Burnham, I'd simply replicate New Labour's energy exporter status.