Splotchy

Splotchy

@isplotchy.com

Six foot tall biped, largely sedentary

128 followers251 following1.1K posts

The bride wore safety orange / The groom wore a high-viz vest / They invited no one / Couldn’t care less about the rest

An infinite loop of Captain America “I understood that reference” GIFs referring to the immediately prior GIF. How does the loop start? Why with a GIF reply to this post, dear child. Uhhhhh SHOW ME THE MONEY!

We’ve hidden Ed Sheeran in this Colchester couple’s nappy bin. With the next disposal of the fetid droppings of their toddler Nigel, they’ll be treated to the intimate concert of their lifetime.

Only a handful of people bought Velvet Underground records when they came out, but every one of those people went on to be cast in Avengers Doomsday

A heated four-hour argument at the late 60s Grateful Dead compound on whether it should be Truckin’ or Trucking

I live on a sliver of waving grass A small field in a cloverleaf interchange Nobody visits But the occasional coyote

“Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship OH MY GOD LOOK OUT!” #EndAFamousMovieQuoteWithOhMyGodLookOut

An A.I.-generated commercial starring simulacra of Billy Dee Williams, Rutger Hauer, and Sylvester Stallone, advertising the new evening cereal Nighthawks

Could have been more nice posts about Tom Noonan on Bsky. Here’s one. Didn’t see ppl mention him in Heat. A worn-in, comfortable performance opposite De Niro. Happy we had him in lots of stuff.

Proposed amendment to the English language: New word “bitweekly”, which means twice in one week. “Biweekly” now means once every two weeks. Apply same pattern to other time periods.