fourteenthirtyfive

fourteenthirtyfive

@fourteenthirtyfive.xyz

14 followers6 following44 posts

In retrospect, it was a grave mistake to have ever "masked" (in the neurodivergent sense). Looking too normal creates expectations of future normality. The problem with that is that while the "emulation layer" (as I prefer to call it) is highly robust in some areas, it is severely lacking in others.

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When you ask for details and you get twenty words, where you need two hundred, or two thousand, or twenty thousand, who is going to go back and ask for more? Who is going to ask for more, when the average person does not seem to even understand the concept of offering this level of detail?

Eventually, spending your entire life feeling slightly out-of-step with the whole world around you wears you down. It's not something where you eventually assimilate and you forget that there was ever a time before. No, it's a limp that never goes away, always reminding you that something is off.

In retrospect, it was a grave mistake to have ever "masked" (in the neurodivergent sense). Looking too normal creates expectations of future normality. The problem with that is that while the "emulation layer" (as I prefer to call it) is highly robust in some areas, it is severely lacking in others.

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You don't expect the person with a successful career, for whom independent living has never been in question, who _looks_ normal and _acts_ normal most of the time to actually have gaping holes in their ability to function and to do the things we expect of "normal" people.

And who is going to say "despite several decades of adulthood, I do not understand this, so please ELI5?". Who is going to be the squeaky wheel, the person who needs an abnormal level of support?

In retrospect, it was a grave mistake to have ever "masked" (in the neurodivergent sense). Looking too normal creates expectations of future normality. The problem with that is that while the "emulation layer" (as I prefer to call it) is highly robust in some areas, it is severely lacking in others.

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At the risk of falling prey to stereotypes, you expect the person who, you know, _looks_ a little off to need more support. The person who can't sit still, the person who is obviously stimming, the person who asks seemingly bizarre questions or who uses phrases like "temporary loss of knitting".

When I was younger, I did more of these things, and perhaps, just perhaps, people understood better where I was coming from, and that I was decidedly not normal. But in time, I abandoned (or suppressed) many of these practices, thinking that emulating normal human beings was the path to success.

In retrospect, it was a grave mistake to have ever "masked" (in the neurodivergent sense). Looking too normal creates expectations of future normality. The problem with that is that while the "emulation layer" (as I prefer to call it) is highly robust in some areas, it is severely lacking in others.

fourteenthirtyfive reposted

A message for my trans sisters, especially the older ones. I’m living proof it’s never too late. I transitioned at 66 and just turned 70 this week. I’m so happy I can finally be comfortable in my own skin. I’ve had more adventures in the past 3+ years than I ever could have imagined.

I understand that ordinarily folks bring baked goods to their new neighbors when they move, but in my case my neighbor is a 345kV substation. If I bring cupcakes do you think they’ll let me look around?

fourteenthirtyfive reposted

the appeal of forced feminization to the closeted trans woman is simple: it makes transition no longer her *fault,* freeing her of responsibility for claiming her desire it offers something different to the out trans woman: a world where transition is no longer her *problem.* in this essay I will

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