Citizen’s Arrests World Record Holder 2003

Nute Gunray Force Ghost smiling and nodding watching me tip 0%

3pm americano and no lunch #yum

The city is crumbling to pieces without me

Tweemarine Special Units (2)

Theyre making it illegal this winter

The twisted origin of Jaypson Foreheese

Now watching

(LinkedIn Bio) Customer Wrangler @ Battery Emporium 2002-2005 CEO @ Battery Emporium 2005-2005 Beaver Shredder @ PA State Parks Department 2005-2009 Trapped Inside @ Magic Crystal 2009-2024 Unemployed 2025-2026 Flamethrower Trooper @ Obama Presidential Center Security Team

Resident evil 9 is very frustrating because all of the pieces are there for a really great story but they put them together completely wrong

RIP Walter Koenig, the glue that held so many of TOS’s more Dadaist episodes together

How it feels to eat a lemon protein bar and a mexican vanilla iced espresso

Financially and logistically impossible but i would love to own a boat

Finally sat down to cancel my philadelphia inquirer subscription today and it’s so funny how many offers they make you on the way out. Literally like 12. We got down to 20 bucks for a whole year which i almost considered just because of how low that is

Deep in thought (debating which philly t shirt to exchange for my halo 3 odst one when I go to my parent’s house for thanksgiving)

Block letter college style sweatshirt that says “Taliban”

I don’t even really have any particular RE2 nostalgia but the bit in 9 where you walk into the RPD station and the stinger plays and leon starts having flashbacks is good

new blood #gundam

Lil buddy

And ALF, say what you will about that mongoloid freak but at least he knows the importance of cuniling-(aide starts whispering in my ear) He What! Ah hell no!

This movie is going to go triple platinum with people who convinced themselves the black ops games are woke

They know me at the TJ Maxx. They know me.

Cleaning the bottom of your shower mat is one of the greatest indignities of the modern world

By and large the Moebian 6th are dripped the fuck out

Landlord sent a guy over to put a red explosive barrel in my apartment today. “I don’t want that” i said “It’s in the lease we can do it.” He said.

I have made 10,000 citizen’s arrests this year

Facetiming obama while I’m sitting on the toilet

Charging into a crowded red line train car like an ogryn in darktide

I had 4 crab wantons and 5 soup dumplings for dinner I’m gonna let out the craziest fart of my life when I get home

Guy who looks exactly like a human version of spongebob just got on the train. I’m going to ask him for his autograph

Looking into the mostly empty bar inside the downtown wholefoods but not going in because I’m waiting on multiple unpaid invoices

This did not make me think she was innocent but it did make me think her boyfriend should also be in jail

Now warching

My bathroom is a target rich environment

Tuna sandwich and a modelo for lunch #yum #gay

This was my nickname in highschool

(Captain Janeway) We mean you no harm. We’re just trying to pass through your sector {Nute Gunray} yes of course. Of course. But eh, for a small fee of course.

It’s kinda disappointing the “weapon customization” in RE9 is actually just a straight forward upgrade path

Whiskey and mac and cheese night is so fun to have but the next morning you don’t think that. I’m not even really hungover it’s just a bad combination of things to consume

40 year old women make the world go round