Martin Campbell

Shut down the youth clubs. Sell off the playing fields. Put up "no ball games" signs. Make public places hostile to teenagers. Then: "Young people, eh? Always indoors looking at their phones."

@pizzaexpressuk.bsky.social walked into the Maidenhead branch five minutes ago and the chef has shut up shop and no one is serving. Don’t you guys like money?

“Played with all her heart” = “Could start a fight in an empty room” #TheTraitors

Maybe the real winner of #TheTraitors is rhe memes we made along the way?

#TheTraitors - the wrong people won.

How is Leanne STILL pissed that Alex has voted for her. What a twat. #TheTraitors

I’m a grown man I should not be as excited about this as I am #TheTraitors

It’s obvious Charlotte or Frankie have to go and here they are about to turn on Alex #TheTraitors (And Leanne’s getting aggressive again as per usual)

That’s because Leanne goes mental at the drop of a hat! #TheTraitors

“I am a Mummy”. Fuck Off Frankie having a womb doesn’t make you trustworthy. #TheTraitors

I think that Charlotte dresses like a toddler makes her even more terrifying. She’s like fake Welsh Chucky #TheTraitors

Frankie needs to start fighting back or Charlotte will start to set the narrative. #TheTraitors

Do #TheTraitors get to keep the awesome cloaks after the show finishes?

Brilliant.

Tomorrow: Francesca - "Charlotte is a Traitor" Leanne - "Screw you I've voting for Alexander because he didn't believe me" #TheTraitors

Freddie just made the biggest own goal since Liz Truss’ budget. #TheTraitors

Leanne “it wouldn’t make sense for me to be a Traitor”. ITS LITERALLY THE GAME LEANNE OF COURSE IT WOULD MAKE SENSE LEANNE YOU MUPPET. #TheTraitors

I want Leanne out she’s doing my head in now. She’s pissed off he doesn’t believe her as she’s saying she doesn’t believe her. AAARREGGHHHH bring back Joe! #TheTraitors

This is some of the best TV we’ll get this year. #TheTraitors

Calm, measured Alexander Vs “I hate the world” Leanne. Oh this is gonna be good. #TheTraitors

Idea for a new show - Leanne getting massively pissed off at everyday situations. #TheTraitors

Who would start a fight in an empty room the fastest - Leanne or Kemi Badenoch? #TheTraitors

Charlotte starting to sharpen the knife there. #TheTraitors

If only Leanne was as concerned about finding the traitors as she was about what everybody thinks of her. #thetraitors

Leanne is so thin skinned I’m wondering if she is Donald Trump in disguise. #TheTraitors

Minah is definitely going tonight. #TheTraitors

What stops the Traitors giving silly answers they know the rest wouldn’t guess? #TheTraitors

BYE JOE. You massive bellend. #TheTraitors

Trump "I learned a lot" - that might be the biggest lie he's ever told.

I do love how the players flip flop between second guessing the producers as to “who will be a great Traitor” and then getting pissed off when people “play the game”. Total Muppets #TheTraitors

Joe is a fucking knobend and I’d happily punch the Beavis looking cunt into next week #thetraitors

Joe is such a whiny child. Sulking because people didn’t vote for him. Kill him now. #TheTraitors

#TheTraitors aka “Overthinking - The TV Show”

I find writing CVs hard. The balance between “missing key information” and “going on too much and sounding like a knobhead” is not a balance that comes naturally to me.

Is there anything more boring that writing career notes for an updated CV & LinkedIn profile on a Sunday morning? It's gotta be done, but man I'd rather be doing anything else.

So it turns out going to the gym once in January isn’t enough and I actually have to go multiple times a week forever. What sort of nonsense is this? I demand a recount!

I went to the gym yesterday and today my legs hurt. I’m clearly so self centred that I decided the whole internet needed to know this.

A day or two ago someone shared a brilliant piece of data that gave some breakdown of rape (or sexual assault) data by ethnicity to show that Robert Jenrick is full of shite claiming it's all immigrants. I didn't save it - if anyone reads this can knows where it is please tag me in.

#nosferatu - Woman saves the world with her magic fanny. I enjoyed it, very stylishly shot and very very silly. Also a bit sexy in places.

Optimist: The glass is half full Pessimist: The glass is half empty Gregg Wallace: This glass isn't going to fill itself is it love?

I'm dipping my toe into the world of #React to host a static site on S3. I'm still unsure how I can have this site interact with other #AWS services e.g. posting information to land in DynamoDB in a secure way. Can someone point me at some docs to explain this as my GoogleFu is failing me.

#wicked was just SO GOOD

Today I am sat in Bristol hoping #GWR can open the line so I can get home! There’s worse places to hangout I suppose.

It’s always a little slow the day after a rugby game. Nothing a fabulous roast at The Potted Pig won’t sort out though.

As a 44yr old man I’m not sure I should be this ridiculously excited to see #Wicked. But I am, and I regret nothing. Roll on Monday!

Sat in a pub in #cardiff watching a man eat a burger without taking out the little stick they use to hold it all together. I guess some men just want to watch the world burn.

reminder of the time john prescott was given a state banquet on a trip to Beijing and then told them it wasn’t as good as Mr Chu’s in Hull (source: hull daily mail)

How to write a limerick There once was a [person] from [place] Whose [body part] was [special case]. When [event] would occur It would cause [him or her] To violate [law of time/space].