Laura Melon

Crow

Taking a very brief pause from my bsky break to declare that I will be complying with the EHRC guidance like I comply with this country's drug laws 🖕🖕

removed bluesky from my phone and after a quick browse on my personal computer realised that it is indeed a very boring place, see yall around

Just applied to an evening part-time course for Carpentry and Joinery. They asked for my GCSEs which was a struggle to remember. Hopefully the degree will be sufficient. Fingers crossed I get accepted🤞

The sun is so warm, the sea is so beautiful, and the wind is so... windy

My best craft advice is "Put a giant worm in it." You can never go wrong with a giant worm. Sci-fi: Giant worm on an alien planet Fantasy: Giant worm in mountain sitting on a pile of gold Horror: Giant worm (eats people) Romance: Giant worm causes third-act breakup Mystery: Giant worm investigates

Love to get static shocks from my "lawn"

"It's not the towering sails, but the unseen wind that moves a ship" English Proverb

The new Squarepusher is good

When I think of a "royal gala" it should summon my imagination in an explosion of splendor, not remind me of a distinctly average apple

I'm not sure how I ended up browsing r/UK_Food, but it is people posting the most disgusting meals, with this one guy posting a "treat" like 4 times a week

The biggest issue with AI is CEOs being under the delusion they're useful individual contributors again

Great, on-call for the apocalypse, have to stay sober 🙄

my friend very kindly sent me a chocolate egg, but I believe the real motivation was sending the cat a box of Mon Petit Intense

"Everything is worth what its purchaser will pay for it" Publius Syrus

Feeling exhausted/ill so taking it easy at home this week and the cat could not be happier

Can anyone recommend an office chair that has a little "sidecar" for a cat? because she hates it when she can't sit next to me when I'm working at my desk

I just gave myself a nasal rinse. I am Reborn. I can smell things properly again.

Currently at Knight Club, chess and a DJ

This is completely insane, lads. It’s not her that’s obsessed with anything, it the tiny gaggle of absolute headbangers who have not stopped screaming at her about it for five years. *You* are the wackos here, not her.

When people ask me how I am, I always say "I'm good, thank you" but because of how I say it, they normally respond "I'm good thanks", even though I never asked (at least it makes me seem polite)

Never thought I'd utter these words, but sad to be getting to the end of my binge watch of Downton Abbey

Wanna see Ryan Gosling fuck a rock? Have I got the film for you

Enjoyable number of cafes here that play jazz

I'm unsure how we got into this habit but the cat demands that she must sit to the left of me

Beautiful weather, worked from the pub and bumped into TWO people today, I am in high spirits

omg, my new GP phoned me out of the blue to discuss switching medications and blood test results, this is uncharted territory, amazing

He's playing the circle game against the nation

Suddenly realised I have space for a rowing machine

Invention idea: a small butter fridge with a timer that automatically turns off early in the morning which allows my butter to become spreadable, and then turns back on around midday. Let me know if this already exists

Just listen to what Andrew’s nickname was amongst royal protection officers.

Annoyingly I've never slept better and it involves getting into bed at 10pm and waking before 7am

There's a bus round here that goes to Goldstone Valley and I feel like I'm living in Transport Tycoon Deluxe every time I see it

It is an extremely wet day for a 3 hour football tournament

I've watched only the first two episodes of A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms but have already derived more pleasure from those two episodes than I did from two seasons of House of the Dragon. A little whimsy makes a tale.

It's here! Halfway through one guy shook his head and said no, it's not coming up the stairs. So I said fuck that, let me help, and we got it up!

Sofa delivery day today \o/

I started listening to Jazz FM in the evening on my little DAB radio and it got me in the mood for stoned listening to The Nightfly by Donald Fagen, and hello! I'm back again in yet another Steely Dan phase