Dave

Ooh, Vivek is going to lower gas prices by suspending the gas tax! Wait, why are gas prices so high? Why are you running away???

Me: Oh hey babe, they're announcing who is doing the Super Bowl halftime show My wife: [yelling from down the hall] It better not be fuckin Jay Z!

Can't think of many conversations I would want to hear less than Jerry Jones and Stephen A Smith.

My wife said Nathaniel Lowe looks like he could have been in Super Troopers, and yeah, I kinda see it.

This week I’ve seen men ridicule women for dressing “too provocatively” & other men ridicule Muslim women for dressing “to conservatively.” A reminder that men should shut the hell up, stop worrying about how women dress, & instead expend their energy on getting men to stop raping & abusing women.

Did Petey Halpin not come up as an outfielder? I thought that was his natural position but he breaks the wrong way on a ball at least twice a game.

Patrick Bailey is to ABS challenges what Freddie Kitchens was to NFL challenges. It's not about being a good challenge, more about "boy it would be great if this got overturned"

Charlie Brown has said he will redistribute his hoes

Since the #Guardians need to show some fight to stay alive in the playoffs, this seems ilke a good time to share this incredible painting my wife got me.

fuck i just realized my wife has never disavowed the muslim brotherhood

Good. Unless he's going to hit it wouldn't fix what's wrong with the team right now.

Well that's a fun way to completely waste an ABS chellenge

Let's try this again

I don't know if it made the broadcast, but the saxophone player doing the national anthem had to hold a note for like 20 seconds because the flyover jet was running late. Early game MVP candidate.

Her "immigration status" is that she's been a US citizen longer than either Melania Trump or Elon Musk. The Democrats SHOULD use this opportunity for 100% solidarity with one of their own, and throw the fucking kitchen sink at Trump and his Republicans. I doubt they will but would LOVE to be wrong.

Am I the only person who immediately thought about Rammstein's video for Keine Lust?

Whoa wait a minute, the cops AND border patrol endorsed Husted? Well I might just have to rethink my vote* *I'm kidding, fuck them and him

Ok, I get it, you're hoping to get him on track but this game is still in reach, and Angel is just flailing up there.

Fuck. That was the opportunity.

These military commercials are like fanfic written by a horny 12 year old and we should all be embarrassed by them.

Why? Why follow the leadoff walk by swinging at the first pitch? I don't like it when old Rocchio shows back up.

Why are we being bad at defense today?

Taking a break from baseball posts to remind you to please, for the love of God, do not ever give any kind of AI access to your financial information.

I get being aggressive against a pitcher throwing a lot of strikes, but some of these swings feel like "let's hurry up and get the lead"

That was a real dumb challenge by the Rays. I like it.

It's easy to lose in the offensive performance last night, but Foster Griffin is quite possibly the MVP of that game. Minimized the damage in the first inning and then settled in to give them 4 strong innings and keep the team in a position to catch up and not immediately burn the bullpen.

You could tell me Jose Ramirez raised someone from the dead on his way back to the hotel and I would not bat an eye. There is not anything that guy can't do.

Pedro and Jose just dropping into Spanish and letting everything else fall aside makes me smile.

What a huge win to start this series. Griffin settling in after a rough start. One run allowed on a solo HR by the bullpen. And insurance runs from the offense with Jose creating chaos. Guards ball.

"Ramirez laughing his way to the plate". Love it

I have watched a LOT of postseason Cleveland baseball and I can't ever remember first base being open in a late inning situation and Jose not getting the intentional walk.

That's two really bad strikeouts for Rocchio tonight. Ready for his playoff version to show up.

Oof. Glad to see both of them back up. That could have been really bad.

The HR wasn't great, but I'll always take a solo HR off a reliever as opposed to a walk. When you get out there and throw strikes that's going to happen occasionally.

I don't want to get ahead of myself, but DeLauter getting hot would be a real difference maker this series.

Yandy hit first base almost as hard as he hits the weights.

I don't like the Angel PH there. Halpin is the far better defensive option on a fast playing outfield in a close game. I don't care about that AB nearly as much as the fielding the remainder of the game. Doesn't help that he has been LOST at the plate

Went down the hall to kiss my wofe goodnight and Bailey homered while I was gone. I'm starting to form a plan here...

Cantillo is an interesting choice to come in here. I don't hate it.

Gonna be really fun if Espino goes on an Andrew Miller/Cade Smith guy who comes in and strikes everyone out run.

Griffin has really settled in and pitched well. These are some big scoreless innings to cover, and the Guards are getting hits, just not right when they need them.

Ok, that obviously wasn't great, but catastrophe avoided keeping it at 2 runs.

I’m ok. Make no mistake: this is an attempt to target political enemies and weaponize federal law enforcement. For ten years, Trump has targeted me with baseless lies and smear campaigns. This is just the latest escalation in his campaign of political intimidation. I will not be silenced.

My hot analysis for how the Guardians can win: score 4 runs.