🔥 Actually Fire 🔥

If you're still voting Democrat, you're part of the problem, not the solution.

"You don't even need me, but why should that stop you from buying me?"

My landlord has a habit of fixing things that don't need it, and ignoring things that need fixing, so him fixing something that actually needs fixing is probably a first. I've lived here four years.

Just spent another day in bed with diverticulosis, and apparently it's my beloved blueberry pancakes that are causing it. Why does everything so delicious have to be so bad for me? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

My roommate thinks I have "holy diverticulosis"

Lmao no

Yup

Today in, "Needlessly Gendered Products"...

My garden has had a welcome guest.

Ok so, "Subspace Rhapsody" is the greatest episode of Star Trek ever produced, and I will die on this hill.

I never get this many likes on ANYTHING LOL

This is hysterical

I just finished this gigantic poster. It took 16 sheets of legal-length photo paper and it's the largest poster I've ever made. Image credit: MariAN.Art on Pinterest

Jelly Roll is 100% what the WWE needed.

Rest in piss

Well, that's odd.

BWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA

LOOK AT THIS AT CUTE LITTLE TINY MONITOR I GOT FOR THE RASBERRY PI

I bought a Raspberry Pi and this sexy game controller to play retro games on it.

Fuck the Po lease

I just realized I can do this. Eat my entire ass, #Chime

OHHHHHHH OHHHH OHH OHH OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Ok so Nancy’s on the list

My roommate can't stop pronouncing Jade Cargill's name like "Jane Carhill" as if he's got some kind of speech impediment and it's driving me fucking wild. I'm gonna have to get him to stop talking about wrestling somehow...

Took the scenic route to Lansing, Michigan to visit my son, Jude!

Q'pla!

Has there been a murder?

No lies told here.

The ground turned green since the aurora was so bright

A country that doesn't have free health care, full welfare with no time limit, free quality education is NOT A RICH country. It's a country that LIES to itself while the rest of the world LAUGHS.

Today is the first time I've met all three goals.

So glad we all get to experience the Most Ironic Independence Day In American History.

LOL

I just found out that Jimmy Dean the singer is the same Jimmy Dean that makes sausage. I'm stunned.

I feel like I'm in bizzaro land.

Haaaaaahahaha

I need this more than I need to breathe air. www.facebook.com/share/p/15aN...

My mom sent me this picture from Walmart. My stoned ass was like,"What if it printed weed?" Lol