Post

SO MUCH oralist rhetoric boils down to "If you teach your child ASL, you'll lose them to the terrible Deafs." As an imperfect father (and mediocre signer) I would like to stake my position clearly: we want our kids to go no-contact because of our personality disorders, not lack of language.

Language deprivation is going to make for tough family relationships to start with—even if (especially if) it sabotages your kid's independence. And if it doesn't, dinner table syndrome very well might—there's no better reason to go low-or-no contact with fam if you don't get anything FROM contact.

But there are even higher-level meta-resentments that I see with the deaf children of oralist parents: Feeling like you weren't worth learning sign for. Feeling like you were kept from community for selfish reasons. Feeling constant pressure to "be normal."