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I've seen a million accounts like that but it only just struck me how much that bio type reads like some kind of unhinged board book for fully grown man-babies.

I always assumed it was the effort of a person with almost no empathy or theory of mind trying to construct a bio that would theoretically appeal to the kind of lady they didn't have the guts to hit on in high school without technically lying too much.

it seems like a common fb/twitter normie thing to fill your bio with noun phrases describing your IRL relationships and maybe a couple ideological allegiances

This is why I don't DM anymore. Even if all I want to say is, "I enjoy your work," it might come off as creepy. Now I just post on the main thread. That way, people can judge me based on that. BTW, I really enjoy your work, Sen.

Not all of them, but a lot of them are bots.

When men creep on me in person, I instinctively recite that bio in my head and start laughing, which usually scares them away.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but putting your pronouns (he/him) in your profile doesn't actually give you permission to sexually harass a lesbian.