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promising the holy grail—free pizza for an entire year and guaranteed popularity. Armed with fierce determination and unbothered by tact, Zoe charges headfirst into this hormonal Hunger Games, sidestepping "gonorrhea grenades" and

somersaulting across precarious birth-control balance beams without bothering to check who's flattened beneath her ambitions. Enter Miles Greene—kind-hearted, overly earnest Miles—who

insists that friendship and understanding should matter more than winning, clearly misunderstanding the sacred laws of high-school survival. As alliances splinter, dodgeballs bruise egos, and the absurdity hits catastrophic new highs,